Saturday, September 28, 2019

The Importance Of Understanding That Some People Will Never Change Because Of You.

Most of realize that throughout the course of life that change is going to be inevitable. This is something that I've talked about many times through this blog, and I'm pretty certain that this week's topic won't be the last time that I do. One of the more interesting things about change that makes it unique is that it entails so many things. It can literally be applied to almost anything because nothing stays the same throughout the course of time. The form of change that will be addressed in this week's topic deals with people. We as people and individuals all have unique ways that define who we are and how we do things. Now most of us are likely close to someone that have ways that we may not like. Beyond us just not liking their ways, they may have some characteristics about themselves that may be both harmful to themselves, as well as others. Again, this can isn't limited to just one thing, and includes a variety of ways to be defined. One of the most frustrating things that I think most of us can agree with is dealing with a person that isn't willing to change their ways. Most of you may have people in your life that are commonly referred to as being stubborn and hardheaded. These are the people that regardless of what you may say or do to try and help them, they constantly resist your advances towards helping them to see the error of their ways. If we're going to be honest here, this also applies to us as well, and I'm sure that even I myself have people that think of me in this light. Regardless of whether this describes you or not, the fact remains that some people are never going to change. More importantly, it is wise to remember that they will never do it because of you.

Yo, what's going on everyone? Back in the mix again is your boy Brad H., and welcome once again to another entry of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am back to bring another topic of interest that will hopefully serve as some inspiration for us all. Thank you in advance to everyone that are joining me for another week. So for this week's soapbox, I'm going to be addressing the tropical storm that hit the Texas coast last week. Now anyone that frequently reads my topics or follow me on Twitter know that I'm from Texas. Now the area that I live in got a lot of rain from Tropical Storm Imelda, but I don't live in a flood prone area. However, the neighboring areas in the Golden Triangle of southeast Texas got hit very hard due to being flood prone areas. The unsettling thing about all of this is that this was an area that was greatly affected by Hurricane Harvey two years ago. So many people that were affected by Harvey and maybe hadn't fully recovered from that nightmare had to endure it all over again. I even know people personally that have and still are dealing with the aftermath of both of these storms. Now I'm bringing all of this up to say that something isn't quite right when it come to the topic of climate change. I've brought this up before, it seems as if these storms are becoming stronger and weirder to the point where they don't seem to be normal. This personally leads me to believe that climate change is truly something that needs to be addressed. I know it's a topic that is being discussed heavily in the political world, but I think that it's time for the talking to turn into action. Who knows, maybe there isn't anything that can be done to prevent these storms from being at the level they are, but I think most of us can agree that the seasons are becoming hard to distinguish at times. Thoughts to everyone affected by Imelda, and I know Texas will bounce back. We all always do! So now that I've addressed that, lets go ahead and talk about this week's topic of understanding the importance of realizing that some people will never change because of you.

Now in the most recent installment of giving my perspective through this platform, I talked about how everything in starts with the person in the mirror. That particular entry was more about us as individuals and how we view ourselves from an internal aspect. While I'm a firm believer that what you think of yourself should matter more than what other people think of you, I'll concede that there are going to be occasions where what others think will matter more than you can imagine. I want to bring this up because there was a section of the last entry where I talked about how a person has to be willing to change for themselves first before wanting to change for others. I am sticking to that belief, but there is also another side to this that has to be addressed. What happens when you are the person that is wanting someone else to change? Maybe you have someone in your life that you care for, and you see them doing various things that have you concerned to the point where you fear for their well-being. Change tends to take on a different type of perspective when it's not us that is that are trying to change, but rather we're hoping to see someone else change doesn't it? It kinda puts you in the mind frame of being the only one in the classroom that understands what the teacher is teaching with no problem, and you're wondering why everyone else in the class doesn't get it. The innate desire to see someone you care for change their ways when see you see problems can be something that leaves you full of frustration, and it will have you pondering on why they can't just do better. Again, it takes on a different perspective when it is someone else that you can't control doesn't it?

There is another key component that we have to talk about when it comes to wanting to see someone change their ways. What I'm referring to here is the "You" factor. What do I mean by this? There's an extended belief that most people have when it comes to wanting someone to change, and that is the idea that they'll do it for me, ie you. We have this belief that we have a degree of power over others that will force change upon them. How many times have you said or heard someone say something to the effect of; "If you truly care about me, you'll change." Now there are going to be some instances where this more in your face type of approach will work. Though I'm sticking to my belief that a person has to be willing to change for themselves first, some people are willing to conform to changing if it means that much to someone that they truly care for. These are what I would consider to be the more flexible people when it comes to changing. Then we have those that regardless of what you say or do, they are never going to change their ways. You can preach to them till you get tired of talking, they're not going to change. You can actively take steps to get them the help they need, and they won't budge. You can reason with them, and they won't move. You can even go so far as to threaten leaving them, and they still won't adhere to you. See from my perspective, it is important to remember that a person is always going to do whatever they want regardless of what anyone says. This isn't only limited to the people they're close to relationship wise. Some people are going to love you, but that doesn't mean that they're always going to love you enough to do what you say or change their ways. This can be tough to accept, but I think it is a necessary reality from my perspective.

So why is it ultimately important for us to understand that some people will never change because of us? From my perspective, I feel this is important for us to be able to keep our own minds on the right path. I've talked about how some of us deal with frustration and anger cause people aren't willing to change their ways. We all know by now that anger and frustration when not applied in a healthy way can lead to our own set of problems. Now don't get me wrong, if you love and care for someone you shouldn't give up on them. However, what is the exact benefit that comes to us when we're dealing with an individual that isn't responding to us? From my perspective, I don't see any benefit, only potential problems. This is why we have to understand the people that we're dealing with in our lives, as well as the effect that having them in our lives plays on us. Going even deeper on this topic, there is also another darker reason why I feel it is important to understand why some people will never change. We've all heard of the saying "birds of the same feather flock together", right? There are some circumstances where you can find yourself bringing yourself down to another person's level by dealing with them despite their negative tendencies. Some people come to what I would deem as a "dark" realization that in order to get their point across that they have to sink to the same level of the person they're attempting to influence. I personally don't care for this tactic, and I say that because doing that can have even greater consequences. As much as some of us hate to acknowledge it, there are some people in this life that you can only deal with on two levels. You can either accept them for who they are, and realize that they're not going to change because of you. The other option is to leave them alone completely for your own sanity. Tough choices right? Choose wisely everyone!

Well I think I've pretty much summed up what I wanted to get across in this week's edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! Thank you to all of you that stopped through. Regardless if you are a first or longtime reader, I appreciate all of you so much. I hope that this has been a discussion that most of you can relate to. Please feel free to add anything in the comment section if your heart so desires. If you are on Twitter and want to connect with me, you can hit me up at the handle @BradrickH. I hope you all enjoy the rest of your weekend, and I hope you all have an even better week ahead. We're coming up on the month of October, which is insane to believe. This year has gone by so fast. 2020 will be here before we know it, so lets make the rest of 2019 the best. See you all in the next topic! Peace out!

©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Saturday, September 14, 2019

The Importance Of Understanding That Everything Starts With The Person In The Mirror.

There is no denying that this world would not be where it is now had it not had people that wanted to make a positive change inside of it. I'm in no way saying that everything going on in our world is all peaches and cream. There is definitely negativity and strife happening, as that has been happening since the beginning of time. However, for all the negative things that come along with living in this world, there is also positive things taking place as well. I talked in the last installment about self improvement and how it is a battle that you can only win. I bring this up once more because I believe that anybody that is focused on improving themselves will also want to help improve this world. When I say "improve this world", I'm not only referring to something that that will change the world like curing cancer. Though that would be a great contribution to this world, I am more so thinking along the lines of making a difference on a smaller scale. I'm talking making a difference that doesn't come with accolades or financial gains, but the kind of difference that helps those that are near and dear to us. This includes things like trying to be a better person for your family, friends, and your community. We often make it our mission to be there for others, but many of us forget the importance of making ourselves a priority. In order for us to be a light to this world and the people that are in it, we have to work on improving ourselves first. Furthermore, in order to improve ourselves, we have to understand that everything starts with the person that is staring at us in the mirror.

Yes, yes y'all! It is your guy Brad H. back once again, and you are now tuned into another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! We are back for another edition to bring a topic that can hopefully serve as inspiration for us all. How have you all been doing? Great I hope! I know all of you that are NFL fans are doing more than great right about now. This is the time of the year that we all enjoy so much right? So what can we take away from the first week of the NFL? For the most part I can nothing as of right now besides the New England Patriots are going to be very hard to beat like always. That whole Antonio Brown fiasco with Oakland was just weird, but it seems like the Patriots are going to be his team for the time being. I notice people are jumping on the Cleveland Browns for how they looked in the week 1. Though I'm not a Browns fan, I think it is too early to say what teams are going to be like after week 1. We have to be mindful that a good portion of these players didn't even play much, if at all in the preseason. Of course they are going to be rusty, and their timing is going to be off. I am personally happy about how well my Dallas Cowboys done in the week 1. I'm not going to say too much since it was the Giants, but the offense looked pretty good; even better than I expected. Week 2 of the season is here, so we'll see what happens this week that is going to be of noteworthiness. I'll likely be bringing up more NFL topics on my soapbox in the coming weeks, so lets go ahead and transition into the theme of this week's topic. That would be the importance of understanding that everything begins with the person that is starring at you in the mirror.

Now in order for us to get down the importance of understanding that everything starts with the person in the mirror, we have to put into perspective what we're referring to. As with the last topic that was covered a couple of weeks back on self improvement, this week's topic is one that be viewed in many different contexts. It all boils down to how your view your life, as well as what you're trying to achieve with wanting to improve yourself. The bulk of the perspective that I'm going to be coming from with this week's topic blends in more with what I brought up earlier in regards to trying to be a better person for others. Though this is the perspective that I'm referencing in this topic, however you may view it in your own life is totally okay. Now there's a popular song that many of you are familiar with that came out in the year 1988. It was from the "King of Pop", Michael Jackson, and the song was titled "Man In the Mirror". I'm pretty sure that any of you that were alive at that time remembers this song and the chorus to it. However, for those of you that may be younger and not know what song I'm referring to, I would highly suggest going on Youtube or any other platform that has music and give it a listen. So in the song that we're talking about, Jackson is singing about how he wants to change his ways by starting with the person that he is looking at in the mirror. He goes on by saying; "If you wanna make the world a better place take a look at yourself and make a change." These are some pretty profound lyrics in my opinion, and though they could be applied in numerous contexts, I believe the general message is one that we can all relate to. We as individuals really have to evaluate ourselves before we try to make a difference. However, there is a potential issue that comes along with taking a look at ourselves in the mirror.

The potential issue that I'm thinking of that I referred to in the last paragraph is the idea that it can be extremely difficult for us to look at ourselves in a critical manner. This is something I've brought this up on several occasions via this blog in various contexts, but it is something that I strongly believe. It is much easier for us to judge and analyze others, rather than taking a look at ourselves. I believe the potential issue with this is that when we look at ourselves with honest eyes and critically, we will often find things about ourselves that we may not want to see. We all have aspects of our personalities that we try to shield and suppress others from knowing, and I feel this is nothing to be ashamed of. However, if you are an individual that actually wants to improve yourself for the benefit of others, you have to first acknowledge that other people can't be your sole reason for wanting to change. Picture this scenario as a example. Imagine that a guy is in a relationship with a woman, and the woman wants him to put more effort towards bettering himself for their relationship. Maybe she wants him to be more attentive to her or something of that nature. Now lets say that the guy adheres to her wishes and tries to show her more attention, but the kicker is that there is a more deep rooted reason for why he may not be as attentive. Now in order for him to change his ways, he must be willing to acknowledge that he has issues first. Also, he has to want to change for himself first, because if he just tries to change for her, there is a high probability that he will fall back into his previous patterns. I believe that change should happen naturally and start within a person first. Then, and only then through their acknowledgement and work towards changing, they will by default be able to help others.

So to sum up this week's topic and bring this post to a close, we have to always be mindful that we have to first be able to help ourselves before we're able to help others. This is why I feel it is of importance as to why we need to understand that everything begins with the person that is staring at us in the mirror. Every day that we're given to wake up and be alive to take a deep look at ourselves in that mirror, we have to be able to be happy and content with the person is starring back at us. There are too many of us that are looking at ourselves everyday in that mirror, and we aren't finding that we're consistently happy with what we see. Also, we try and reconcile the unhappiness we feel from not being happy with what we see by going out of our way to help others. Everything in your life should always start and end with you. If you want to change aspects of your life, that change has to always be one that you want to make for yourself. As with the example I provided earlier, we are always going to have people that will push us to be better. However, until it is a change that we want for ourselves and not only for the sole reason of others, the attempts will often be null and void. Now with all of that being said, I'm in no way saying that you have to be 100 percent happy with yourself in order to help others or contribute to this world. As I mentioned earlier in this post, we all have qualities about ourselves that we may not like, and we have to be willing to work towards fixing those things. It's not a perfect journey, however, I feel that becoming the best version of ourselves is how we truly make a change in the lives of others. Remember that it will always end and begin with you, and you'll find that you'll be able to make an even bigger and better impact on those that you care for.

Well that is pretty much all that I have for this week's topic on the importance of understanding that everything starts with the person in the mirror. I hope that this was a topic that most of you can relate to, and hopefully there was some kind of value that was able to be taken away from it. Thank you once again to all of you that tuned into another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! Like always, if you all have anything that you'd like to contribute in regards to this topic, please feel free to do so in the comment box. You can also hit me up on Twitter @BradrickH. I hope you all have a great rest of the weekend, and an even better week ahead. I'll see you all on the next topic. Stay up everybody, and peace out!


©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Saturday, August 31, 2019

Why Self Improvement Is A Battle That You Can Only Win.

There are constant battles that we all have to take on in this thing called life. Battles can take place in many forms, and aren't only limited to squaring off against an outside force. In fact, often times the most important battles that we as individuals will face are the ones that take place within us. I believe that these are the most important battles we face due to the fact that they are the ones that make us face things about ourselves that we may not want. Though facing off against something or someone besides ourselves often deal with external factors that may leave the outcome out of our control, the battles we face within ourselves are the ones that bring the most pressure. We're expected to win these battles because they're viewed as something that we should always conquer. Another what I would call is a misunderstanding of the word battle is the idea that battles always correlate to something negative. Going to war or getting into a confrontation with another person is what most people think of when it comes to battles. These types of battles are understandably viewed as negative due to the outcomes often ending tragically. However, I'm one that believes that not all battles are bad, and there are some that though they may not always be pleasant while they're taking place, lead can lead to something better for us. When I think of battles that involve and solely rely on ourselves, self improvement is the thing that I think of first. Most of us don't put something like improving ourselves in the same sphere as being in a battle, but there are small internal battles that will come when a person makes the choice to improve themselves. It can get discouraging at times, but it's important to remember that battles of this nature are ones that you can only win.

What's up once again to all you good people! This is your guy Brad H. back once again to bring you all another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! Shout out to those of you that are joining me once again for another topic that will hopefully serve as some inspiration for us in our lives. I was just thinking about how fast this year is going by. I say that because during this time next week, the NFL season will be underway. I know all of you football fans out there are super excited. I'll more than likely be getting into more football talk in the coming weeks, but I want to address something more serious in this week's soapbox section. So we have a hurricane in the Atlantic that is heading towards the United States. As of right now, it appears that Hurricane Dorian is headed towards the state of Florida. The landfall is still a day or so away, so there is still so much in the air as to where it will ultimately land. As someone that lives near a coastal area here in Texas, I am familiar with having to get prepared for hurricanes. I know that this is something that I've brought up on here before, but if any of you are in Florida or an area where this storm could hit, please take heed and not take it likely. If you're someone that isn't in the path of this storm, please keep the people that are in your thoughts in hope that they'll be prepared. It just amazes me every year how so many people lose their lives because they don't take these things serious enough. We are dealing with mother nature here everyone, and she isn't prejudiced against any of us. Hopefully Dorian doesn't do too much damage, but with it likely being a category 4 storm if and when it does land, I highly doubt that isn't the case. Just be safe and take precaution everyone. Things like this are way more important than sports, etc. Now that I've gotten on my soapbox, I'm going to talk more about why I believe self improvement is a battle that we can only win.

Before I go deeper into this week's topic of why I believe self improvement being a battle that you can only win, I want to start off by saying that the idea of self improvement as a general statement has variance when it comes to us as individuals. It can mean different things for different people, and it can also include a variety of habits and issues that could be addressed by an individual. Rather than listening to what another person's idea of what self improvement is, I feel that it is more important for us as individuals to look within ourselves and define what it means to us. I wanted to be sure and start off this topic by mentioning that, because I know that this is one of those topics that is subjective to the individual. Now when it comes to the idea of a person making the decision to take steps towards improving themselves in life, it is going to be viewed by most as something that will be beneficial to that person. While this may ultimately turn out to be true depending on what actions are taken by the individual that is seeking to improve themselves, most people do not really give thought to the potential cons that come along with the decision of making changes. Many of us see self improvement as only a good thing, but we don't talk enough about how painful it can be for a person seeking to improve themselves. Taking on the decision to improve yourself as a person is something that will often come with some degree of anguish. Depending on what it is that you're trying to improve, it may be physical, mental, or a combination of both. This is why I liken self improvement to the idea of being in a battle; there will be attrition that comes along the way. But just like any battle that takes place, there is an end to what you're enduring if you continue to persevere.

When it comes to the idea of being in battle, there is often someone that wins and someone that loses. There is also an unknown that comes along with being in a battle. Take two sports teams that are ranked number one and two respectively, and they are facing one another in the championship game. Since both teams are so close when it comes to talent and ranking, no one will know who wins until the battle between the two is over. Now I talked earlier about battles and how the most important battles that we face are the ones that come from within ourselves. This is how I see improvement in the sense that bettering yourself requires work, but the journey of getting to become the person you want to be can be one of wins and losses. For example, lets say that someone is trying to eat healthier to improve their health. Most people cannot just completely go cold turkey and stop eating things that would be considered bad for them all a sudden. It is often a gradual process that comes with successes and failures along the way till that person eventually rids whatever bad foods they've been eating out of their lives. I bring this point up because it is much harder for most of us to cut ourselves some slack when we mess up on the journey towards self improvement. For most of us that are on the path towards wanting to improve ourselves, it can become discouraging when those moments where we slip up happen. Again, it is important to not beat yourself up when this happens, and most importantly, do not completely quit and give up. This is why it is a battle, because there are both wins and losses during battles, but the war is what we should be aiming to win.

All of what has been said throughout this week's topic has brought us to the point of why I believe self improvement is a battle that we can only win. From my perspective, the reason why a person has already won the battle when they make the decision to improve themselves stems from the decision itself; you're making the attempt to make a positive change in your life. This is a win in my eyes because we live in a world that is full of people that abhor bad and toxic habits. This causes so many people to not even have the fortitude and courage to go against the grain and do something different than the majority. Also, self improvement is one of those things that only increases exponentially as you stay on the journey towards it. Once you begin to gain control of and master whatever you're aiming for on your journey, it gives you even more confidence to tackle other habits that may be hindering your in life. Again, this is journey that will not be for the faint of heart at times. There are going to be times on this journey that you're going to fail and be dejected. However, just like the battle comparisons that we've been using throughout this post, those small wins and losses are a small part of something greater. Remember that this is a battle that is totally within yourself and your own mind. Everything on this journey rests within yourself, which means that you can't hold anyone but yourself responsible for your successes and failures. The main thing that I hope anyone that reads this takes away from it is that self improvement isn't always going to be easy, and most people won't acknowledge the potential downsides that come with it. However, if you continue to push yourself and persevere through the failures, I believe that you'll be a better person for it. Remember, this is a battle that you can only win.

Well that's all I got for this week's installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective' folks! I hope that some of you found it helpful and beneficial to you. Big thanks once again to those of you that tuned in for another week. If you have any comments or concerns, please feel free to leave those down below in the comments. If you're on Twitter and want to connect, you can reach me at the Twitter handle @BradrickH. I'm going to sign off now, and I hope you all are having a great weekend thus far. Please keep the people of Florida in your thoughts. Take care everyone, and have a great week ahead. I'll see you all on the next topic. Peace out!

©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Saturday, August 17, 2019

The Importance Of Loving Yourself Through The Challenging Times You Will Face.

There's a popular phrase that most of us have heard in regards to guarantees in life. The phrase was penned by Benjamin Franklin in a 1798 letter that he wrote that stated that; "But in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.” Of course people have put their own spin on this phrase throughout the years, but the belief of the certainty of death and taxes is something that the world tends to hold near and dear. There is another guarantee that most of us can probably attest is a fact when it comes to life. What is the guarantee that I would be referring to here? I'm referring to the idea that we as individuals are always going deal with facing challenges in our lives. Though the individual challenges we will encounter may be different and unique as we are as people, the fact remains that we all are going to have circumstances and obstacles that we're going to have to overcome in our lives. Most of us can probably point to an instance or multiples times in our lives where something that challenged us in some form caused us to get down on ourselves. Maybe whatever we were dealing with was something that didn't think we could be past, or may have been something that questioned our belief in ourselves. In worst case scenarios, we may have dealt with something that we felt was so insurmountable that we began to hate our lives and ourselves. Facing challenge is something that is a part of life, which means that it is quite normal. However, the idea of losing faith in ourselves the point where we began to hate ourselves is far from normal. We have to know and understand the importance of loving ourselves through the challenge times we face.

Yo, yo, yo! What's happening good people? This is Brad H. reporting once again, and you are now tuned into another installment of 'Brad H's Perspective'! I am back once again to bring another topic that will hopefully serve as inspiration for us all. Hopefully all has been good and well in everyone's lives since the last topic. So for this week's soapbox section, I want to get back to some sports related talk. Now I know those of you that are football fans are probably getting super hyped now that we're less than a month away from the start of the NFL season. Now for those of you that may not know already, I am a Dallas Cowboys fan. If you aren't a fan of or follow the Dallas Cowboys, you may not know about this, but Dallas Cowboys running back Ezekiel Elliot is currently holding out for a new contract. Now I'm bringing this up because I had some friendly banter last night with a good friend of mine about this situation. His position was that Elliot should honor his contract and report, which I do agree with. However, I personally feel that there is nothing wrong with a running back of Elliot's caliber getting more money. He's the focal point of the teams offense, and he has more than exceeded what he was expected to do on the field. All of this begs the question: should we be pro team, or pro athlete? Now as a fan of the Cowboys, I want him on the field. However, I can't help but think that what if he suffers a career altering or worse yet career ending injury, and he never is able to get the money he deserves for what he's done? People need to remember that anything can happen to any athlete playing a physical sport, and nothing is always guaranteed to come to them if they get hurt to the point where they can't play anymore. So for those of you that are sports fans, should players honor their contracts regardless if they feel they're being underpaid for what they've done, or do they have the right to demand more? Would love to see what you all think. Alright, now that I've gotten on my soapbox, lets go ahead and talk about this week's topic of the importance of loving yourself through you challenges that you will face.

I want to preface this week's topic by saying that if anyone that is reading this post is having problems to the point where you feel like you no longer want to live, please try and seek some professional help for what you're dealing with. I'm no doctor or mental health expert, so I hope that if this happens to apply to anyone reading that you would please get the proper help if necessary. Besides giving a disclaimer, I wanted to bring that up because this week's topic will be bringing up the idea of engaging in suicide. Now I realize that the word suicide is a sensitive word that can spark emotions in everyone. However, I think it is important to address it in regards to the topic that I'm covering this week. Furthermore, suicide is unfortunately something that is prevalent in today's society. Now I brought up earlier that we all have challenges within ourselves that will lead to us getting down on ourselves. None of us can go through this life without ever experiencing any sort of failures. It's just something that is feasible to do. I've talked about failure in previous installments that I've written on here, and I think it is important to address it as often as I can. My reasoning for this is due the thought that failure in today's society is often looked down upon so horribly. I'm in no way saying that failure is something that we should celebrate or be happy about. However, what I am trying to say that failure is only a state of mind, and it doesn't have to define the moments in our lives. Also, if put into the proper context in regards to whatever it is that we're seeking to accomplish, failure can be an opportunity to learn from and become better. Failure itself isn't always bad, but unfortunately the world we live in doesn't see it that way.

Now for most of us that find ourselves in those challenges times that we're referring to this week, we often will seek out the counsel of other people. Now depending on who and what type of counsel that you may be seeking in these situations, this is definitely a good thing right? However, many of us fall into the habit of always thinking that people will always be there to assist us in the challenges we face. Most of us have what we call a "go to" person that we call first when we're in trouble. Again, there isn't anything wrong with seeking help, that is until the "go to" doesn't pick up. Now this is something that probably won't happen often, and if you're lucky enough in this life to find someone that will always be there for you, cherish them cause it is rare these days. Regardless of that, there is always a risk that other people won't be able to help you through your issues, as there isn't much in this life that is guaranteed. Now the problem with relying on people to help guide us through our personal issues is that many of us often attach too much of our self worth to others being there for us. It's the same concept as being in love with someone to the point where you begin to love them more than you love yourself. It's that emotional attachment that causes us to do and act in irrational ways that we probably would never do if that attachment wasn't there. This can create a life of toxicity to the point where we're not properly attending to our own well being, and it is in these times where we can find ourselves not caring how our life goes. Now there are all type of ways that a person can self deprecate themselves, but the worse is what I mentioned earlier about the idea of a person taking their own life. Now again I'm no expert, but I think that much of these thoughts and feelings stem from a lack of self love.

So why is it important that we continue to love ourselves through the challenges we face? There are a number of reasons why this is important, but from my perspective, it comes down to what I have mentioned throughout this topic in regards to nothing being guaranteed. As much as I dislike saying what I'm about to say, there is no such thing in this world as a "go to" person. Anything and anyone that we're emotionally attached to can leave or be taken away from us at anytime. No matter what comes in goes in this life, the only true thing that you can count on as long as you're alive is yourself. Furthermore, life can often present challenges in our lives that can bring us to dark places. As I pointed out earlier, those dark places can often cause people to lose hope to continue living; hence why I brought up the act of suicide earlier. Challenges and issues in our personal lives are all parts of this life that we will never fully escape as long as we're breathing. However, what we can do is reinforce ourselves that regardless of what we're dealing with in our lives, we matter and are important. From my perspective, loving yourself doesn't mean that you have to always go around touting how important that you are. I believe it means knowing that regardless of what life throws at you, you know that there is a way to overcome it. Now I'm in no way saying that we should go through life being nomads. It is indeed true that we will always need other people in this life. However, when you love yourself through and through, you're more cautious about who and what you allow into your self. This especially applies when we're facing challenges, so make it a priority to love yourself through whatever you face. Don't allow the hurdles and obstacles of life to bring you to a dark place where there is often no return from.

Well that's all that I got for this week's topic on the importance of loving ourselves. I hope that those of you that read this found it both enjoyable and helpful. I'm going to go ahead and sign off for now, but thank you once again to those of you that came by for another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! If any of you have any feedback to contribute or feel that I overlooked something in regards to this topic, please don't hesitate to hit up the comment section. Any and all feedback is welcome here. You can also follow and connect with me on Twitter at the handle @BradrickH. Well I hope you all are having a great weekend so far, and I hope that we all have an even greater week ahead. I'll see you all in the next topic. Take care everyone, and peace out!

©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Saturday, August 3, 2019

Let Your Doubters And Naysayers Be The Fuel To Get You To Where You Want To Be.

I've heard the great motivational speaker by name of Eric Thomas say in one of his past messages that "My haters are my motivation!" Mr. Thomas saying these words aren't the only time I've heard some interpretation of this being said. I believe that some form of this quote is often uttered in the society that we live in today. I believe this is the case due to the fact that nearly everyone nowadays feel like they have "haters" in this life. I personally believe that many of us exaggerate and overstate the term "hater", and the idea of haters is a false perception that we create. Whether the belief that a person has haters in their life is real or a perception is beyond the point, but what I do know is that many of us handle the people that hate on us in this world the wrong way. Now to each's own when it comes to dealing with doubters and naysayers, but I just personally have a belief that so many people resort to anger and bitterness when it comes to dealing with these skeptics. Now if you notice I used the terms "doubters" and "naysayers" instead of "haters", because I personally believe that they're pretty much one in the same for the most part. So going forward in this week's topic, I will be referring to haters as doubters and naysayers. Now as I have already stated, many of us give the wrong type of fuel to those that doubt our abilities. There are many ways that a person can choose to deal with a naysayer and unbeliever when it comes to our abilities, but I personally feel that rather than giving into the negative perceptions and words of these people, we have to let them be the fuel that gets us to where we want to be.

What's good once again everyone? This is your boy Brad H. once again bringing you all another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! Thank you once again to all of you for joining me once again for another topic that will hopefully serve as some inspiration for us all. I hope everything has been going well for everyone that may be reading this as of late. Of course if that hasn't been the case in your life, stay positive and keep grinding to change that. For the last few installments during my soapbox section I have chosen to talk about the NBA. I mean there has been so much happening during free agency right? However, this week I'm going to address something that I've been watching on the television today that is so tragic. So there was another mass style shooting that happened earlier today in El Paso, Texas. If I'm correct about this, I believe this is the third shooting of this style that has happened in the last couple of weeks. I'm writing this off the cuff, so I hope that is accurate. Anyway, all the details aren't out as of yet since this incident only happened earlier today. From what I have seen there are multiple fatalities and injuries. I want to give my thoughts to the entire city of El Paso, and everyone that has been affected by this. I just think it is truly tragic that places where you wouldn't think of being unsafe are the main places these types of incidents are happening at. I can truly see it getting to a point where we're going to have to go through security procedures nearly everywhere we go. It's truly sad that people resort to having to do things such as this. Again, thoughts and prayers to everyone involved. Something has got to change. This stuff is happening way too often. So now that I've addressed that, it is time to get into this week's topic of letting the doubters and naysayers be the fuel to motivate us.

Now this week's topic is one that I personally like to talk about. My reasoning for this is because I know it is one that most of us can relate to for the most part. The majority of us have all had times in our lives when we've had people doubt whether or not we were able to accomplish something. I believe that probably the worst thing about someone that is a doubter or naysayer is that they aren't prejudice for the most part. When I say that I mean that people of this nature can come in any form when it comes to our interactions with them. If you happened to encounter someone that doubts you, yet you don't have a close relationship with that person, their doubting of you probably wouldn't bother you at much in comparison to a relative or close friend that doubts you. Understandably so, it is those close relationships with the doubters that affect us the most. Part of this stems from the fact that we tend to expect more from the people that we're close to. So many of us have the belief that those we care for will always support and believe in us regardless of how wild our vision may be. However, we have to be mindful that we live in a world of realist for the most part. This doesn't apply to everyone, but most people are quick to shoot down something if they can't see it for themselves. You could tell someone that you have a goal in mind that you want to accomplish, and if the person that you're telling this to can't visualize themselves doing it, they probably will think it's unattainable. This ultimately means that they probably won't support and encourage you in your mission, and as I have stated already, this can often lead to frustration and anger. Basically, it leads to all the wrong things, but I believe there is a way that we can combat against this happening.

Before I get into how we can combat against the doubters and naysayers, I want to do what I normally do with topics of this nature and provide examples of the point that I'm aiming to make for this week. Now when we think of fuel and how it works, we most likely think of a special fluid that goes into a vehicle to make the vehicle run. Another standpoint that that most people view fuel in is from a food point of view. In order for us to have the energy to do things in this life, we obviously have to fuel our bodies with food right? Now the thing about giving fuel to something; regardless of what you're fueling, is not all fuel operates the same. Also, not everything that requires fuel to operate will react in a positive manner. There is such a thing as putting a certain kind of fuel into a car, only to find out that car doesn't perform properly. If an athlete eats something like a cheeseburger before an event they're competing in, that athlete likely won't be at their peak performance had they ate something healthier beforehand. With all of that being said and despite having bad fuel in a vehicle, the bad fuel will eventually cycle out of the car it was in. This means that next time you need gas you can fill it up with better fuel. The athlete that eats the cheeseburger may not perform their best, but depending on what sport they're participating in, they will likely get another chance to eat better before the next event. The point I'm making with these examples and how they relate to this week's topic is that of course doubters and naysayers can frustrate us just like bad fuel frustrates a car, and poor foods frustrates an athlete. However, the the doubts people project upon is is similar to fuel in the sense that those doubts if put into proper context can motivate us, but they eventually can pass on through.

So how can we take the frustration that can happen when people doubt us and use it in a more positive way? Remember how I mentioned how when put into the right context that doubts can help motivate us? You have to always be mindful of what people say while you're in the act of whatever you're seeking. However, instead of being mindful in a negative way that involves anger and frustration, you have to be willing to turn it on itself to where it makes you have a desire to work even harder. From my perspective on this week's topic, a good majority of us allow our frustrations from what naysayers and doubters say to either make us quit completely, or we will eventually forget about what was said and stay mediocre in what we're trying to do. These are the acts that we shouldn't engage in because when you quit or stay mediocre in your goals because of what someone else thinks, you are giving them exactly what they want. You have to be willing to see the doubters and naysayers as a form of competition. We all know how athletes tend to go even harder when they have a rival they're facing. The doubters and naysayers are your rivals, and you can't allow what they say to deter you from winning. Finally, using doubters as fuel isn't about trying to prove something to them. A lot of us would rather do something that we may not entirely want in order to prove other people wrong. I see it more as proving something to yourself in the sense that you are enlightened enough to take negativity from others and use it towards your own good. So don't allow what is said from the doubters and naysayers to affect your personally. Treat it as business, and use it as fuel to get to where you want to be.

Well that is all I got for this week's topic folks! This has once again been another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective', and I once again want to thank those of you that stopped by. As always, I hope that there was some understanding that could be taken away from this topic. If anyone has any feedback or anything questions or concerns on this or any of the other topics that I've covered, please hit up the comment section. Also, if you're on Twitter and you'd like to connect with me, you can follow me at the handle @BradrickH. I'm going to go ahead and get out of here, so I hope you all are having a great weekend so far. Also don't forget to keep the people from El Paso in your thoughts. Have a great week ahead everyone, and I'll see you all on the next topic. Peace!

©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Saturday, July 20, 2019

Overthinking, And How It Can Be Detrimental To Our Lives.

One of the most infamous sayings that many of us have heard throughout our lives is that too much of anything can be bad for you. I'm sure that at some point or another that we've all had moments where we've had to ponder on that saying. We really had to sit down think to ourselves if there could be anything in this world that we could overdo without it being harmful to us. One of the things that I changed my tune towards some years back was the idea of drinking too much water. I mean we're told that we should drink as much water as we can because it is healthy for us right? So I thought to myself that too much water can't really be bad for us, that is until I read a story of a person that consumed so much water that they died from it. That's pretty scary if you ask me, but the point is that I've yet to find a direct challenge to the idea of how too much of anything can be bad for us. Now every single one of us engage in the idea of "thought" through various points throughout the day. What exactly is thought? Thought is defined as "the action or process of thinking". Since nearly every action and decision that we make requires thought in order to come to a decision, the idea of thinking is something that is both normal and healthy for us. The idea and action of thinking is part of life, but as with the saying that I brought up in regards to the idea of too much of anything can be bad for us, thinking too much aligns with this idea also. Overthinking is something that we all engage in, some of us more than others. However, regardless of how little or much we overthink, too much of it can be detrimental to our lives.

Yo! What is going on once again people? This is your boy Brad H. back on the mic, and I'd like to welcome you all once again to another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am back to bring you all another topic that I think would help us to move forward in our lives. How has everything been going for you all? Good I hope! Well I thought I would be giving an NBA talk a rest since the finals concluded, but I gotta bring up the big trade that happened between the Houston Rockets and Oklahoma City Thunder. So the Rockets sent Chris Paul and some draft picks to the Thunder for Russell Westbrook. Wow! I think most of us figured Westbrook would be leaving OKC since they are clearly reloading their roster, but I didn't expect to see him dealt to the Rockets. It's going to be very interesting to see how two high usage players like James Harden and Westbrook play together. I know they played together previously when Harden was in OKC, but that was a different situation. Neither player were the players that they are now, so the dynamics are different. As for Chris Paul, I can't really say that I feel all that bad for him in this situation. He clearly prioritized getting paid over winning when he signed that max contract with the Rockets last season. Maybe he knows he is on his way out of the league in a couple of years and wanted to get paid, but he probably has very little chance of winning a title now. We'll have to see if he ends up playing the entire season with OKC, but with their roster going younger, I don't see it happening. Like I told one of my buddies the other day, seems like the off season of the NBA is more interesting than the regular season. Well that's enough talk for my soapbox, so lets talk more about this week's theme of overthinking and how it can be detrimental to our lives.

Before I tackle this week's topic of overthinking, I want to emphasize that the detriments it can create in our lives isn't singled to only one thing. I'm going to provide a couple of examples of how I personally feel that overthinking hurts us, however, these examples are only a small portion of how overthinking can be a detriment in our lives. I just wanted to get that out there before going into the points that I'm trying to make. Now when it comes to the idea of a person being in thought or the act of thinking, I can see how it may be hard to grasp how being in too much thought can be a bad thing. After all, the action of thinking is how nearly everything in this world that we live in operates and functions. For there to be roads, computers, and any other thing that operates in this world, someone had to have an idea to create those things. This means that there was thinking involved that went into those ideas coming to fruition. The process of thinking isn't a bad thing, so I'm not implying that thinking is bad. As I have stated already, it is the overthinking that can create the problems. Now in saying that overthinking can create problems, I'm not even necessarily saying that overthinking is that bad of a habit if it is practiced within proper context of what it's aiming to accomplish. I know that may sound a bit counter-intuitive, and a direct contradiction to this week's topic, but the overthinking, though not entirely bad is what gives birth to the potential problems that we create.

Now that we've talked over the act of overthinking, it is time for me to provide a few examples of why overthinking can be hurtful us. One of the statements that I've heard my mom say a lot throughout my life is how we as people "get in their own way". She'll be like; "You keep getting in your own way", or she'll say something along the line of; "so and so are getting in their own way." Now I'm just speculating what I believe she means by saying that, but when I hear a statement like "getting in your own way", I instantly think how we as people often times block our own door towards the path that we need to take. I think of this quote when it comes to the act of overthinking, so I guess I have to thank her for that statement, though I'm sure she isn't the only person that uses it. Some of us right now have something that we want to do or accomplish, yet we haven't made an progress towards it because we're thinking too much instead of just acting. This hurts us from reaching our full potential, and can even keep us away from opportunities that await us. There are some of us right now that have something that we want to say to someone that care for, but because we're wondering what their reaction to what we want to tell them will be, or how we will look while saying it, we'd rather just not say anything and keep it inside. For those of us that have engaged in these type of habits, we're well aware of how bothersome it can be when you keep things bottled up inside of you. Quite frankly, keeping things inside for too long can affect both our physical and mental well-being.

Now that we've established a general definition of what overthinking is and touched on a couple of examples of what I believe are instances where we tend to overthink, the question to this week's topic is why exactly can overthinking be a detriment to us? Well from my own perspective and besides the examples that I talked about previously, overthinking in my opinion causes us to be too much in our heads rather than just living in and enjoying the moment. When we're overthinking and dwelling on the "what ifs", it drains us from being able to be present and in the moment. We don't want to live our lives thinking way too much because when you're overthinking things in this life, you are playing out scenarios that likely will not even play out in the manner in which you're thinking about. Furthermore, it is also possible that these scenarios won't even come to fruition, which means you ultimately spent time and energy towards something that wasn't worth it in the end. Also, I could be wrong saying this since I'm not a medical expert, but I believe overthinking plays a big role in why so many people struggle with some form of anxiety. So in summation, thinking isn't a bad thing, but we want to find a healthy balance of doing so. Life is for the living, and thinking too much doesn't allow us to live. Rather that being thinkers, we should strive to be doers. Overthinking and being too much in our heads will cause life to pass us by, and if that's not what we should want since we only get one shot at life.

Well we have reached the end once again, so I'm going to sign off for now. Thank you all once again for those of installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I hope this topic was able to touch someone out there, and I hope there was some understanding that could be taken away from it. Please feel free to leave any feedback below, or you can connect with me via Twitter at the handle @BradrickH. Also, everyone stay cool out there. I know there is a major heatwave going on in the country right now. I was mowing the grass the other day, and I had to take more water breaks than normal because it was so brutal outside. Be safe and be smart my friends. Alright guys, I'll see you all in the next one. Thank you all, and peace out!

©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Saturday, July 6, 2019

The Importance Of Accepting Things For The Way They Are.

There's an old and famous saying in life that goes; "You can't have your cake and eat it too!" Most of us have heard this before and know what it is referring to. It's basically a way of saying that you can't have everything you want in this life without giving up something. Once you eat the cake it is gone, which means you can no longer have it. I somewhat liken it to the idea of a person being selfish. If we're going to be completely honest with ourselves, I believe that most of us can grasp onto the idea that we're all selfish at times. Some people are selfish more than others, but regardless of how unselfish a person may claim they are, there is no way around we as individuals being selfish at times. We all have certain moments and instances in our lives where we have our own individual agendas that we want to work out in our favor. If you ask me there isn't anything wrong with that, especially when it doesn't come at the expense of hurting other people. I mean it's our lives, so we should do all that we can in order to make ourselves happy. Well unfortunately in this game of life that we're navigating through, there are going to be also be moments when things will not work out for us in the way that we'd like them to. We all have different ways of dealing with such moments, but there are times when these moments can become too much for a person to bear. Moments of this nature can cause us to become uncomfortable and can lead to unhappiness in our lives. I'm a believer that the majority of the unhappiness that many of us experience in our lives is pretty much self induced due to the fact that most of us have a hard time accepting the harsh realities of life.

Hey, what's going on people? This is Brad H. back once again, and you are now tuned into another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am here for another week to bring you all a topic that can serve as a bit of inspiration to us all. Thank you all in advance for visiting, and I hope that things are going well in your life. You know, I'm beginning to believe that free agency in the NBA is becoming more exciting than the season itself. So since free agency has started, we've had several key moves happen. However, the biggest move happened last night/early morning when the biggest free agent on the board, Kawhi Leonard finally made his decision. He decided to join the Los Angeles Clippers, and equally as big was the Clipper acquiring Paul George from the Oklahoma City Thunder. All I can say is WOW! I'm personally happy with this, because though I'm not a Clippers fan, I think this is big for their team. Another aspect I noticed was how the sports media were trying so hard to push Kawhi to go play with LeBron James on the Los Angeles Lakers. You had guys saying that the Clippers had no shot of landing Kawhi, and some saying that there was a 99% chance that Kawhi would go back to the Toronto Raptors. I think that just proves that most of these guys that are commentators really don't have inside information like they claim. Not only do I think it's pretty dope how Kawhi zigged when everyone else seemed to want him to zag, but I think this move makes the NBA much more competitive. I mean lets face it, had Kawhi joined LeBron and Anthony Davis on the Lakers, it would likely be a foregone conclusion that the Lakers would win it all next season. It has been a very interesting free agency period so far, so we'll just have to wait and see what happens next. Alright, now that I've gotten on my soapbox for a bit, lets go ahead and talk more about this week's topic of the importance of accepting things for the way they are.

Now before I go into the heart of this week's topic on the importance of being able to accept things for the way that they are, I want to preface it by saying that pretty much anything can be applicable to this topic. It's not limited to just one or a few things, but more so applies to us as individuals in our own lives. As I've stated many times before, we're all individuals that have varying viewpoints. There are some things that certain people will be able to accept on move on from, while others may not be able to do so. It all comes down to you as a person. So now that I've gotten that point taken care of, lets go ahead and get into the meat of this week's topic. I think it would pretty accurate for me to say that we as people in general prefer to be in control of things. Like I pointed out earlier, we're all selfish in our own ways, so it would make sense that we'd prefer to have things go our way at times. Now I'm not speaking for anyone else, but I'm pretty sure that most of us have found ourselves in certain circumstances that we had little to no control over. It could have been a situation involving a family member or a friend, or maybe even a complete stranger. It could have been a situation or scenario that involved some sort of events happening that you had little to no control over. If we really think about it for a second, I think most of us can agree that we've dealt with dilemmas of this sort. Now if you think about a child that doesn't get their way, what does a child do when they don't get their way? They often cry or pout right? Well even as adults, many people act in this manner, yet instead of pouting we often become angry and frustrated right? From my perspective, it is in here where the problem lies when it comes to accepting things for the way they are.

Now expanding on my points of anger and frustration, from my perspective, they are often the starting points for more potential issues taking place in our lives. I mean most of us don't properly channel the anger that we experience in positive ways, which means that our anger frequently works against us. Last week I saw a video online of a Walmart employee throwing objects off of the shelves because he had been let go. Obviously he was angry, which is why he raged out in the manner that he did. Now depending on the circumstances and how much of a role that he played in what caused him to be let go, it is understandable why he would be angry. However, being let go by the company is something that he he no control over once they made the decision to part ways with him. It was no longer under his control, which means that there wasn't much more that he could do to change the situation. Rather than seeing the situation that he was in for what it is and thinking that maybe there is a greater meaning behind what happened to him, he made the situation worse with his actions that followed. Not only is he no longer employed with the company, but he will likely be facing criminal related problems. This is a prime example of what I mean when I say that we don't always properly channel our anger. It is also an example of what I mean when I say that anger and frustration are the breeding ground for more potential issues in our lives.

So why is it important to accept things for the way that they are? Well from my perspective, and from what I've already touched on, there are so many aspects of this life that you're never going to be able to change. It's like being in a relationship with someone that you want to change their ways, yet they never do, unless they are ready for it. It's not something that you can control, so it sorta defeats the purpose of even worrying about it. I believe that this is much how life in general is. We worry about and stress over so many things that we have absolutely no control over, which in turn causes us to be unhappy. There are many of us right this moment that are struggling with being happy in our lives because we're overly concerned with circumstances that we don't have the ability the change. I haven't always felt this way, but I believe one of the best ways to find happiness in this life is accepting life the way that it is. There has to be an understanding that not everyone is dealt the same hand when it comes to life, and that is one aspect of life that just has to be accepted. However, rather than focusing on people and circumstances that we cannot change, wouldn't it be more beneficial to put more energy towards the things that we do have power over. What am I primarily talking about right here? Yes, got you it, I'm talking about OURSELVES! We are the only ones that have the power to change our lives in a manner in which we can find peace and happiness. I believe that by doing this, we're able to gain a sense of power over ourselves and how we react to the world around us. So with all that being said, remember that there is only so much in this world you can control.

Well that pretty much does it for this week's topic. I'm going to go ahead and bring this one to a close as I feel that I've been able to get my point across. Thanks once again to every single person that stopped by for another edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I really appreciate you all, and you all inspire me to keep on dreaming and believing. If any of you have any comments or feedback to give, please feel free to do so. You can also connect with me on Twitter at the handle, @BradrickH. I hope you all have a great weekend, and I'll see you all in the next one. Oh by the way, stay safe out there everyone. I know there was a big earthquake in California yesterday, so everyone be safe and cautious wherever you are. Take care everyone! Peace!

©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.