The Importance Of Understanding That Some People Will Never Change Because Of You.

Tweet

Pin It

Most of realize that throughout the course of life that change is going to be inevitable. This is something that I've talked about many times through this blog, and I'm pretty certain that this week's topic won't be the last time that I do. One of the more interesting things about change that makes it unique is that it entails so many things. It can literally be applied to almost anything because nothing stays the same throughout the course of time. The form of change that will be addressed in this week's topic deals with people. We as people and individuals all have unique ways that define who we are and how we do things. Now most of us are likely close to someone that have ways that we may not like. Beyond us just not liking their ways, they may have some characteristics about themselves that may be both harmful to themselves, as well as others. Again, this can isn't limited to just one thing, and includes a variety of ways to be defined. One of the most frustrating things that I think most of us can agree with is dealing with a person that isn't willing to change their ways. Most of you may have people in your life that are commonly referred to as being stubborn and hardheaded. These are the people that regardless of what you may say or do to try and help them, they constantly resist your advances towards helping them to see the error of their ways. If we're going to be honest here, this also applies to us as well, and I'm sure that even I myself have people that think of me in this light. Regardless of whether this describes you or not, the fact remains that some people are never going to change. More importantly, it is wise to remember that they will never do it because of you.

Yo, what's going on everyone? Back in the mix again is your boy Brad H., and welcome once again to another entry of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am back to bring another topic of interest that will hopefully serve as some inspiration for us all. Thank you in advance to everyone that are joining me for another week. So for this week's soapbox, I'm going to be addressing the tropical storm that hit the Texas coast last week. Now anyone that frequently reads my topics or follow me on Twitter know that I'm from Texas. Now the area that I live in got a lot of rain from Tropical Storm Imelda, but I don't live in a flood prone area. However, the neighboring areas in the Golden Triangle of southeast Texas got hit very hard due to being flood prone areas. The unsettling thing about all of this is that this was an area that was greatly affected by Hurricane Harvey two years ago. So many people that were affected by Harvey and maybe hadn't fully recovered from that nightmare had to endure it all over again. I even know people personally that have and still are dealing with the aftermath of both of these storms. Now I'm bringing all of this up to say that something isn't quite right when it come to the topic of climate change. I've brought this up before, it seems as if these storms are becoming stronger and weirder to the point where they don't seem to be normal. This personally leads me to believe that climate change is truly something that needs to be addressed. I know it's a topic that is being discussed heavily in the political world, but I think that it's time for the talking to turn into action. Who knows, maybe there isn't anything that can be done to prevent these storms from being at the level they are, but I think most of us can agree that the seasons are becoming hard to distinguish at times. Thoughts to everyone affected by Imelda, and I know Texas will bounce back. We all always do! So now that I've addressed that, lets go ahead and talk about this week's topic of understanding the importance of realizing that some people will never change because of you.

Now in the most recent installment of giving my perspective through this platform, I talked about how everything in starts with the person in the mirror. That particular entry was more about us as individuals and how we view ourselves from an internal aspect. While I'm a firm believer that what you think of yourself should matter more than what other people think of you, I'll concede that there are going to be occasions where what others think will matter more than you can imagine. I want to bring this up because there was a section of the last entry where I talked about how a person has to be willing to change for themselves first before wanting to change for others. I am sticking to that belief, but there is also another side to this that has to be addressed. What happens when you are the person that is wanting someone else to change? Maybe you have someone in your life that you care for, and you see them doing various things that have you concerned to the point where you fear for their well-being. Change tends to take on a different type of perspective when it's not us that is that are trying to change, but rather we're hoping to see someone else change doesn't it? It kinda puts you in the mind frame of being the only one in the classroom that understands what the teacher is teaching with no problem, and you're wondering why everyone else in the class doesn't get it. The innate desire to see someone you care for change their ways when see you see problems can be something that leaves you full of frustration, and it will have you pondering on why they can't just do better. Again, it takes on a different perspective when it is someone else that you can't control doesn't it?

There is another key component that we have to talk about when it comes to wanting to see someone change their ways. What I'm referring to here is the "You" factor. What do I mean by this? There's an extended belief that most people have when it comes to wanting someone to change, and that is the idea that they'll do it for me, ie you. We have this belief that we have a degree of power over others that will force change upon them. How many times have you said or heard someone say something to the effect of; "If you truly care about me, you'll change." Now there are going to be some instances where this more in your face type of approach will work. Though I'm sticking to my belief that a person has to be willing to change for themselves first, some people are willing to conform to changing if it means that much to someone that they truly care for. These are what I would consider to be the more flexible people when it comes to changing. Then we have those that regardless of what you say or do, they are never going to change their ways. You can preach to them till you get tired of talking, they're not going to change. You can actively take steps to get them the help they need, and they won't budge. You can reason with them, and they won't move. You can even go so far as to threaten leaving them, and they still won't adhere to you. See from my perspective, it is important to remember that a person is always going to do whatever they want regardless of what anyone says. This isn't only limited to the people they're close to relationship wise. Some people are going to love you, but that doesn't mean that they're always going to love you enough to do what you say or change their ways. This can be tough to accept, but I think it is a necessary reality from my perspective.

So why is it ultimately important for us to understand that some people will never change because of us? From my perspective, I feel this is important for us to be able to keep our own minds on the right path. I've talked about how some of us deal with frustration and anger cause people aren't willing to change their ways. We all know by now that anger and frustration when not applied in a healthy way can lead to our own set of problems. Now don't get me wrong, if you love and care for someone you shouldn't give up on them. However, what is the exact benefit that comes to us when we're dealing with an individual that isn't responding to us? From my perspective, I don't see any benefit, only potential problems. This is why we have to understand the people that we're dealing with in our lives, as well as the effect that having them in our lives plays on us. Going even deeper on this topic, there is also another darker reason why I feel it is important to understand why some people will never change. We've all heard of the saying "birds of the same feather flock together", right? There are some circumstances where you can find yourself bringing yourself down to another person's level by dealing with them despite their negative tendencies. Some people come to what I would deem as a "dark" realization that in order to get their point across that they have to sink to the same level of the person they're attempting to influence. I personally don't care for this tactic, and I say that because doing that can have even greater consequences. As much as some of us hate to acknowledge it, there are some people in this life that you can only deal with on two levels. You can either accept them for who they are, and realize that they're not going to change because of you. The other option is to leave them alone completely for your own sanity. Tough choices right? Choose wisely everyone!

Well I think I've pretty much summed up what I wanted to get across in this week's edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! Thank you to all of you that stopped through. Regardless if you are a first or longtime reader, I appreciate all of you so much. I hope that this has been a discussion that most of you can relate to. Please feel free to add anything in the comment section if your heart so desires. If you are on Twitter and want to connect with me, you can hit me up at the handle @BradrickH. I hope you all enjoy the rest of your weekend, and I hope you all have an even better week ahead. We're coming up on the month of October, which is insane to believe. This year has gone by so fast. 2020 will be here before we know it, so lets make the rest of 2019 the best. See you all in the next topic! Peace out!

©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.