The Importance Of Attempting To Be Happy.

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I think that the good majority of us can agree that we all would like to experience as much happiness as we possibly can while we're alive. Of course we do have exceptions to that belief with the people that are miserable, and seem to enjoy having it that way. For the people that have unhappiness in their nature, that's their prerogative I suppose. My only quarrel with people like this is that they are often the ones that attempt to steal the joy of others because their unhappy. That's a topic for another day, but I definitely believe that most of us want peace and happiness in our lives for the most part. Happiness is one of those things that is truly a mindset. It is essentially a state of being that varies from person to person. However, I am a firm believer that it is something that rests solely on our shoulders. It is our responsibility to define what happiness means to us personally, and then take the necessary steps to reach that state of bliss. Something that I've noticed in regards to happiness and how the world we live in deems it is the idea that being unhappy comes from having a lack of items. There are many people out there in this world that truly believe that the only way to be happy is to acquire a lot of material things. In essence, this is what I would call social engineering, and it's a trap that many of us fall. In my opinion, this type of agenda causes us to stay in a state of unhappiness, even when we may have much to be happy for. Because of this type of engineering, I believe that many of us give up on the idea of finding and experiencing happiness. This is why I feel that it is of importance for us to attempt to find happiness.

Hello once again good people! This is Brad H. coming at you all once again, and you are now tuned into another edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! For those that may be first time viewers, this is a platform I use to express my thoughts on a topic that I come up with as a point of interest. I try and use that topic to provide some inspiration that can hopefully serve us all in our lives. How are you all doing this time around? Good I hope. This section of the topic for the week is the soapbox section where I bring up something that is unrelated to the main topic at hand. So this upcoming week will mark the Thanksgiving holiday for many across the world. This is something that I try and bring up every year on my topics, because I think it is something that gets overlooked a lot during the holidays. I want to remind everyone to be mindful of those that are grieving during this time of the year. Yes I do know that the holidays are special for many of us, but the holidays also makes people think about their loved ones that are no longer here. I've talked about it before on here, but I lost a dear family member of mines six years ago during the week of Thanksgiving. Because of that unfortunate event, I tend to look at Thanksgiving a bit differently than I once did. I'm sure many of you can relate to this. I'll close by encouraging you all to call and check up on someone you know that may have lost someone around this time period in the past. Make sure they are holding up okay, and for those you that are personally affected by this, remember that the spirits of our loved ones live on through us. That's all for my soapbox, so lets go ahead and talk about the importance of attempting to be happy.

Now I talked earlier about how I feel that we as people have been socially engineered by the world we live in when it comes to happiness. My reasoning for bringing this up is because I believe that we can all agree that there are so many of us that just aren't happy in life. I know that sounds depressing and self deprecating, but it is a reality for so many of us. Now there are likely some instances where it is genuinely both reasonable and understandable for a person to not be happy. I will also admit that there are different levels when it comes to being happy, so happiness cannot be viewed as something in a vacuum. However, how many of us complain about not being happy despite having some semblance of things that we should be happy for? Most of us have so much to be happy for; heck even just being among the living is something worth being happy for. Unfortunately due to the societal norms that have placed upon us, many of us are unable to see past the fact that many of us do have reasons to have some level of happiness. We spend too much of our mental space focusing our time and energy towards all the reasons we shouldn't be happy, rather than focusing more on the things that we already have. Again, this isn't entirely our fault because I think it has become habitual for us to view life in this way. Most of have been conditioned to view the glass as being half empty over half full, and if we practice bad habits on a everyday basis, those habits become ingrained in our psyche to the point where it's hard to break free of these habits.

Now I brought up earlier the habits and conditioning by society to set up the next point that I want to make for this topic. Hopefully what I'm about to say doesn't come across as too harsh, but the reality for most of us that experience chronic unhappiness in our live is that we are choosing not to be happy. Yes, I am one of those people that indeed do feel that happiness is a choice, and I'm going to expand on that point by saying this. There are many of us aren't even trying to find happiness in our lives. Now some people may read that and say; "Brad H., what do you mean I'm not trying to be happy?" My response to that question would be this; how can you be attempting to find happiness if you're still under the programming that conditions when it comes to happiness? If you've yet to truly break free of the standard of happiness that society has set upon us, how can you truly attempt to have happiness. See, most of us feel like the only way for us to be happy is if we have all these various material items, etc. Too many of us believe that by chasing after these things is the only way for us to attempt to be happy. I personally believe from my perspective that attempting to find happiness means changing our mindset. The thing with happiness is that it always comes in waves. Even people that are generally happy in their lives will go through patches where they experience a lack of happiness. Again, it comes in waves, but changing our mindset is the only way that we can attempt to achieve happiness.

So ultimately, why do I feel is it of importance for us to attempt to be happy? Besides the obvious benefits that come along with being happy in this life, the idea of breaking our minds free of the societal shackles is the main reason from my own perspective. In my opinion, these shackles that I'm referencing in this topic are the reason for many of us to not even trying have happiness. This is why I believe so many of us would rather complain about how messed up our lives are rather than trying to see a better outlook on our lives. As I brought up earlier on this installment, many of us have a lot of things in this life to be happy for. Unfortunately, we often fail to recognize these things because of what we've been deceived into believing what happiness is by the world we live. The bottom line is that if you're someone that experiences long term periods of being unhappy with life, your life and your mind likely will not change until you attempt to do something about it. I believe the best way for us to do this is to start looking at the little things in our lives that most of us take for granted. If you have people in your life that truly love and care for you, that is definitely something to be happy for. If you woke up today and you're breathing, that is something to be extremely happy for. There are many other reasons as to why we should express happiness, but it ultimately comes down to us as individuals. What I do know for sure is that we'll never be happy if we don't try to be, so lets try and change our thoughts to manifest happiness into our lives. There is always hope, but we have to be willing to try.

That about sums up this topic. I've pretty much said all that I think needs to have been said, so I'm going to go ahead and sign off. Thank you all once again to those of you that have read this far. I really appreciate every single person that does. I hope that this topic served as some inspiration for some of you out there. If you have any comments or feedback to give, please feel free to do so. You can also connect with me on Twitter @BradrickH if you like. For those that celebrate Thanksgiving, I hope you all have a Happy Thanksgiving and enjoy your family and the week ahead. This has been another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective' brought to you by Brad H. Take care everyone, and I'll see you all in the month of December.

©2019 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Why Linking Too Much Of Your Happiness To People Can Leave You Feeling Inadequate.

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I think that we can all agree that mostly everyone in this world wants to experience some level of happiness while we're here. I say "mostly everyone" because we also know that there are some people in this world that don't care either way. However, generally speaking, I think that we all want to experience happiness. Now what exactly is happiness? Happiness is a state of being that varies from person to person, and no two people will completely agree on what their definition of happiness is. I personally feel as if happiness is a state of bliss that we all desire. I also see happiness as something that must constantly worked on. I state this because depending on the level of happiness that a person is mentally able to achieve, happiness is a feeling that will be constantly challenged. We all know by now that the feeling of happiness is something that comes and goes. I see happiness as waves that are sometimes high enough to ride comfortably, but those same waves can also be low enough to not even ride at times. Again, it is a feeling that comes and goes. I've already pointed out that happiness is something that varies from individual to individual. However, I think that we can also agree that one of the biggest things in this life that brings us the most happiness is other people. Just take a second and think about all of the people in your life that you love and care for. I'm almost willing to bet that just the thought of these people probably made your heart feel full of joy. I do believe that the majority of our happiness comes from the relationships that we have with other people. However, I also feel that too many of us link too much of our happiness to other people as well. For this week's installment, I'm going to explaining why I feel that this can be a mistake in our lives, and how it can leave us feeling inadequate.

What's going on ladies and gentlemen? I go by the nickname of Brad H., and I'd like to once again welcome you all back to another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am here once again to give my perspective on a subject matter that I've been pondering on as of late. Through the content of this subject matter, I am hoping to bring a bit of inspiration that will hopefully help serve us all in our everyday lives. I'd like to thank you all in advance for those of you that are joining me for this week, and I hope that everything in your world has been full of peace and happiness. I know for a fact that those of you that are sports fans are probably happy. Last week was the start of the 2018 NFL season, and boy did it shoot off like a rocket heading into space. There was quite a bit of high scoring going on overall throughout the games on Sunday. Being that it was only the first week of the season, I don't feel like there was a lot that could be taken away from it. Now those of you that read my posts pretty frequently know that I'm a Dallas Cowboys fan. We saw the Cowboys lose to the Carolina Panthers by the score of 8-16. I personally thought this was a pretty ugly game on both sides from an offensive point of view. I think the end score is a pretty good indicator of that. However, I think a lot of that can be attributed to how well both defenses played, particularly the Panthers. There were a lot of questions coming into this season about how the Cowboys offense would look without having a "go-to wide receiver." Again it is only the first week of the season, so I don't want to push the panic button quite yet. However, I do feel that the concerns about the shape of the Cowboys offense is warranted by fans. I get that this offense is built around having a strong running game, but a team can find themselves without a lot of options whenever you run into a defense that defends the run well. Cowboys running back Ezekiel Elliot wasn't able to get much done, and quarterback Dak Prescott and the receivers besides Cole Beasley looked totally out of rhythm. Again, I want to stress that it is only the first week, but losing Dez Bryant and Jason Witten just may come back and bite this team. We'll see how this all unfolds in the coming weeks. Alright, I've talked too much about football, so lets get to the topic of the week of how putting too much of your happiness into others can leave you feeling inadequate.

Now this is the section of the topic where I give my usual disclaimer in regards to giving my perspective on topics. I make this a priority because I don't want people to get the illusion that I believe I'm always right, nor do I want others to think that I'm trying to change their opinions. We are all unique people that have different ways of thinking and seeing life. Since the idea that we're all different and unique applies to us when it comes to how we think and view life, it isn't realistic to believe that we're always going to agree. As I mentioned earlier, the goal here is to hopefully bring some inspiration to our lives, and I hope that the potential inspiration that I'm aiming to bring encourages us to open our minds to the ideas of others. Regardless of whether or not you folks agree with what I'm addressing for this week, I still appreciate every single person that spends a little time of your day reading this. So why did I choose the idea of how linking too much of our happiness to others can leave us feeling inadequate and unworthy? Well for one, I think this is a topic that I'm sure many of you can relate to. Being that we're living in an era of where social media is so relevant in regards to how so many people view their lives in comparison to others, most of us have probably engaged in this habit. Secondly, I myself have struggled with this in the past, and I'll concede that it is something that I still struggle with on occasion. So I guess in some ways that I'm going to be somewhat speaking from my own personal experiences on this topic. Finally, I feel this is important because I don't anyone out there feeling unworthy or inadequate. If you've lived long enough, the feeling of feeling inferior to others is probably a feeling that you've felt before, and we all know how bad of a feeling it can be. It is one of those feelings that can totally deflate your morale and the way that you view yourself. For this topic, I'm going to be bringing up a few examples of how we engage in this habit, and I'm also going to show why it is something that we have to work on avoiding. Again, I'm not perfect, but I'm going to do my best to get the points I want to make across. Lets go ahead and get into it.

There is no way to avoid people when it comes to interacting with them on a personal level. While there may be certain people that you may not care much for, the interactions we as humans have with one another is something that drives all areas of life. The reason I bring this up is to help establish the idea that having human connections with other human-beings is both natural and healthy. I wanted to be sure and get that out there because what I'm going to say next will likely sound like a contradiction otherwise. The very connections and interactions that we often have with other people; while a good thing for the most part, can also a bad thing at times. Why do I say this you may wonder? As with the theme of this topic that is being covered, we often link too much of our happiness to others. Now when I say that we link too much of our happiness to others, what exactly am I saying here? What I am saying is that there are too many of us that center too much of our entire well-being on the actions of others. Let me paint a couple of scenarios that I think are good at deducing my point. I'm sure that most of you have been in love with someone else at some point in your life. If so, how much of your happiness can you say was tied to the person that you were in love with? For most of us if we're being honest with ourselves, a good portion of it likely was linked directly to that other person. We know this is a fact because when that person hurt our feelings, or if the relationship at the time happened to come to an end, you probably went awhile not feeling much happiness right? Quite a normal thing, but nonetheless, a large portion of our happiness in that relationship was tied to someone else. The next example may not apply to many of you, but think about how many times you've been on social media and found yourself comparing yourself to someone else? Maybe you saw a woman that you liked with another guy, or you saw someone you know taking a trip out of the country, and you said to yourself; "Why can't that be me?" Though maybe a bit extreme, these are a few examples of how we as people tie too much of our happiness to others. One of the biggest problems with this practice is that it often leaves us feeling empty and worthless. Of course this is a feeling that none of us really want, yet time and time again we torture ourselves by putting too much emphasis on others.

So why exactly is tying too much of your happiness to other people a potentially bad thing? Besides what I stated earlier about it potentially contributing to having feelings of inadequacy and low self-worth, quite frankly, the people in our lives regardless of what your relationship with them are never guaranteed to always be in your life. Time and space always bring about changes, and the same logic applies when it comes to people. Why do you think people that were close at one point in their lives tend to grow apart as time carries on? There are circumstances in life that change people to the point where they can become someone you may not even recognize anymore. Though we may not want to acknowledge or accept it, the reality is that a person can walk out of your life at any time without any explanation. I'm sure most of you have dealt with the loss of a friend or loved one right? We all know how helpless of a feeling it is when someone that love and care for is no longer here. I think that we often try to paint an image in our minds that we are in control of things. We believe that if we do all the right things that mold a situation to our liking that we're always going to be in control of the circumstances that surround that situation. From my perspective this way of thinking is all wrong. The truth is that we have little if no control at all over what happens when it comes to dealing with people. The only thing entity in this life that I can think of that we're in control of or responsible for is ourselves. I can't remember off the top of my head at the moment the name of the topic or when I wrote it, but I recall mentioning in a previous topic how another person can never truly make you happy, and how happiness is an inside job. A person can only add to your happiness, but they should never be the end-all be-all of your happiness. Of course some of our happiness is going to be tied to people, but they key word is SOME! Again, it all starts within you, and we have to work on not surrounding our entire life around the actions of others.

So how do we keep ourselves from linking too much of our happiness to other people? I'm going to use an example from a film that I think helps puts this into perspective. I'm sure that some of you may have seen episode 3 of the Star Wars franchise titled "Episode III: Revenge of the Sith". In the film, the character Anakin Skywalker has steady visions of losing his wife, Padmé Amidala. After these continued visions of death and heartbreak take their toll on him mentally, Anakin seeks out the council of Jedi Master Yoda. After counseling Anakin on how to deal with his visions, Yoda tells Anakin to "Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose." Now some may think that is a bit extreme, and I can understand why since it is only a film. However, those words from Yoda were pretty thoughtful. Now how does this tie-in with the topic for this week? For those of us that struggle with linking too much of our happiness to others, we have to learn how to train ourselves to build a wall of happiness inside of ourselves first. You don't want to be a person that allows everything that others do to affect you in a way that brings you done in a negative way. Now none of us are perfect, so there will happen to be times when this will happen for most of us. However, it does happen, you don't want to dwell on it for too long. I think that happiness should be a state of being that can be controlled by us. I believe that when we link too much of our happiness to others, we have lost control of what our definition of happiness is. By doing this, we are allowing other people to define what makes us happy and what doesn't. Again, we cannot control everything in this life, but we can control the things that we choose to make us happy or not. In my opinion, this should never depend upon other people. We have to be willing to put things into the proper context, and be able to see things for how they are rather than what we want them to be. I'll end by saying that you are always an important and valuable person, and no one can ever change that. Even when other people may not see your worth, you are always worthy and valuable to someone.

Well that is all that I got for this installment ladies and gentlemen, so it is time to sign off for this time. This has been another edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspctive', and this is Brad H. saying thank you all once again for those of you that came through. Before signing off, I hope that there was some meaning and understanding that could be gained from this. I also hope that it is able to bring some inspiration to someone out there. If anyone wants to comment or give any feedback to to this topic, please feel free to drop a comment in the comment box. You can also connect with me on Twitter @BradrickH. I hope everyone enjoys the rest of the weekend, and keep the people that are being affected by Hurricane Florence in your thoughts. The trek that storm made from off the western coast of Africa to the states has been wild. Mother nature definitely ain't no joke, so stay safe out there everyone. Well I hope everyone has a good and positive week ahead, and I'll see you all in the next one! Till then, I wish you all the best! Peace!

©2018 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

The Importance Of Not Tying Your Happiness To External Factors And Possessions.

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We all have different views and outlooks on what defines happiness in this life. As with nearly everything in life that has to do with having an opinion, the belief of what defines happiness for a person is totally subjective. Happiness varies from person to person, but I think that most of us have a pretty good idea on what is generally considered to be happiness when it comes to the standard that our society has set. I believe in in American society especially, a good portion of the general standard for a person finding happiness comes from accomplishments and possessions. For example, graduating from college is an accomplishment that undoubtedly makes a person happy. The purchase or acquisition of a new vehicle will make a person happy as well right? In bringing up these examples, I am in no way saying that these examples shouldn't make an individual happy. However, what does things like money, degrees and cars all have in common? They all are things that are external possessions. Now to live and survive in this world, possessions that are of external value are most definitely required, so I'm not saying that we don't need to have these things. However, I do believe that much of our society and culture ties whether we're supposed to be happy or not to these external things. We're all going to have our own unique opinions and experiences on what makes us happy, and I'm not going to imply that external factors and possessions can't make a person happy. However, from my time here on this planet, I've personally come to develop the mindset that external factors aren't the end all be all to having happiness, and tying happiness in with these things can be a devaluing mindset to have.

Greetings ladies and gentlemen. This is Brad H. coming back at you all once again, and welcome to another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am back to hopefully provide some perspective and inspiration for those of us that may be lacking in certain areas of our lives. I hope that all has been going well for everyone as of late. Always be grateful if things in your life are going well, because we all know how quickly things can change. If you've been dealing with some tough times or hardships recently, just keep on trying to make things better for yourself. Just like things can quickly change for the worse in life, they can also change for the better in an instant as well. Anyway, it is good to be back on here for another week. In the last topic that I covered, I talked about the NBA Playoffs that were just beginning at the time. We are nearly two weeks into the playoffs, and a nightmare that I didn't want to see happen came to fruition a few days ago. My San Antonio Spurs were defeated 4-1 by the Golden State Warriors. I'm being a bit sarcastic with the nightmare reference. As I mentioned in the previous topic, I expected the Warriors to win the series despite being a Spurs fan. The Spurs were just over-matched without having their best player, plus being without Coach Popovich after the passing of his wife just made it more of an uphill battle for the Spurs. While I'm at it, I want to extend thoughts and condolences to Coach Popovich and his family. I don't know the man personally, but he is one of the greatest coaches that we've seen in sports. Life related tragedies such as this take precedence over sports. Back to the Spurs; I just love how the team fought to the very end. It was just a reminder of why I've been a fan of this team for so long. There are likely going to be some changes with the roster over the summer, but I'm still proud of them. We still got a couple of series left in the first round that are going on, so we'll have to see what happens in the upcoming days. I do know that the New Orleans Pelicans vs. Warriors series should be a good one. Hopefully everyone is enjoying the playoffs so far. I know that I definitely have been despite the Spurs losing. Well I think that is enough soapbox talk for now, so lets go ahead and get into this week's topic of happiness and external factors and possessions.

As I normally do before covering the topics that I bring up at hand, I'd like to go ahead and give the standard disclaimer that I mention. We all have different views and outlooks on life. The goal with these topics isn't to focus on what is considered to be right or wrong, but rather to encourage others to open their minds up to seeing certain things in a manner they may not have before. Think of this as a hub for inspiration that can inspire forward thinking. Now with that said, I'm just a regular person with an opinion, so I don't expect everyone to agree with me. I'm all about us all being able to get our thoughts out there, and through the process of doing this, we can hopefully learn from one another. As I mentioned in the last topic, I believe that none of us are too big to learn from other people. As for some insight into why I chose this topic, I would just contribute it to recent thoughts that I've been having about how our society deems what is happiness. Most people talk about how happiness is a choice, which I generally agree with for the most part. However, there are many out there that don't share in that sentiment. If it were the case that they did believe that happiness is a choice, then so many of us wouldn't tie happiness to material items and possessions. If happiness is truly a choice, a person would probably be able to feel some form of happiness regardless of what they're dealing with and their circumstances. So with that being said, I figured it would be a good week for me to address my thoughts on this. I believe this is something that many of us already talk about to begin with, so I guess I'll go ahead and add my perspective on here.

Now you may happen be this kind of person, or you've probably found yourself around a person like this, but how many situations have you either said or been around someone that frequently talks about how unhappy they are with their life? Since I believe that we're living in a time where most people aren't happy, I'm willing to bet that most of you have been in situations of this nature. Now in saying that, I want to let it be known that despite me having my own personal beliefs on what happiness is, I'm not implying that any single person should be happy all the time. I understand that things happen in life so quickly that can cause a person to not be happy. Regardless of how happy a person is or seems to be on the outside, every single one of us have moments in our lives that can challenge our levels of happiness. I believe that this is all a part of the cycle of life and how we endure obstacles that are similar to the highs and lows of a roller coaster. Now, while constant happiness is unrealistic for the most part, what is a reality that most of us cannot deny is what I mentioned earlier. The general standard of what happiness is in our society often deals with accolades and possessions. Does everyone think this way? Absolutely not, but we all know that a lot of the reasons why so many people are unhappy with their lives deals with not having certain things. This can be anything from lacking money to lacking the love of a significant other in your life. The basis of why most of us as a people are unhappy comes from something(s) that is lacking in our lives, and these things are often external things. When you really think about it, this way of thinking shouldn't even be all that surprising in a world where most people are trying to keep up with what everyone else has, and there within lies the problem from my perspective.

I've stated this before on here, but because so many of us compare our lives to other people, we often tie our happiness in with what we're seeing from them. In other words, we base our happiness on a false premise of what we see from others. Many of us look at other people that are doing well, and we assume that they must be happy. However, it is always wise to be mindful of what you see on the outside isn't always the truth. Yes it is indeed true that a person can acquire possessions and wealth, but they can also be hiding the fact that they are miserable on the inside as well. Again, the acquisition of wealth and accolades is good, but these are things that can come and go. If we already know that these things are often temporary, then why do we put so much of what we think is happiness into them? Again, this is how our society has been conditioned over the years, and the reason why I address topics like this is to help encourage people (and myself) to realize that following what everyone else or society doe isn't always beneficial to your own PERSONAL life. The reason I put emphasis on the word personal is because only a person can truly know what is good or bad for them, and often what society encourages isn't always what is good for us personally. Anyone is capable of having happiness in their life if they learn to appreciate what they already have, and not be so concerned with what is going on with other people. This practice of constantly following what others do in my opinion is much of the reason why we lack happiness in our lives. Pair that with thinking that external factors and possessions are going to lead to happiness, and you'll find a world that has a lot of unhappy people. This is why I feel that it is important to not tie in happiness to external things.

What exactly do people mean when they say that happiness is a choice? From my perspective, it goes back to what I mentioned earlier which is the belief that a person can have happiness despite whatever circumstances they're facing. You probably don't really need a truckload of money to be happy if you have enough to take care of yourself. You probably don't need a big fancy vehicle to be happy if you have a perfectly working vehicle that gets you where you need to go. You probably don't need a ton of accolades and accomplishments to be happy if you have a good heart and treat people with kindness and respect on a daily basis. See where I'm going with this? It all boils down to perspective and how you see yourself. Even if you don't have much in the aspect of possessions, you are probably a rich person if you have family that care about you. If you have a true friend that you know without a doubt is loyal to you, then you are rich. I believe that it is the things in life that don't have any monetary value that brings us the most joy. I believe this is something that our society has gotten away from, which is why so many of us are unhappy with our lives. I want to encourage anyone who reads this that feel like they are lacking happiness in this lives to reevaluate the things that mean the most to you. Think about your relationships and interactions with others. Instead of always looking at the glass as being half empty, try and think about it being halfway full. Think of and appreciate all the good things you got going on in your life instead of all the thing that are wrong. Instead of looking at what you may be missing, take a closer look at what you already have. I think that if we begin to implement these habits, then we can get to a healthy median of happiness in our lives. That's just my perspective on it.

Well I think that I've said enough on this topic, so it is time to go ahead and bring this to a close. This has been another edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective', and I want to give thanks again to those of you that came by once again. As I always close with, I hope that there was some meaning and understanding that was able to be gained from this. If anybody has any feedback or concerns, please leave those in the comments, or you can hit me up on my Twitter handle @BradrickH. Hope everyone is having a good weekend so far, and I hope that you all have an even better week ahead. We'll be in the month of May the next time I get on here, so lets try and enjoy the rest of April. Again, I hope you all enjoys the rest of the weekend, and I'll see you all for the next topic. Take care everyone, and stay encouraged! Peace out folks!

©2018 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Never Allow Others To Make You Feel Bad For Bettering Yourself.

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I'm pretty certain that most of you have heard of the saying that goes "people are like a bunch of crabs in a barrel". By chance if you have not heard of it before now, this statement deals with the obvious handling of a bunch of crabs stuck in a barrel together. However, there is a sublime mindset about this statement that many people use as a way to describe people that hate to see others rise above them in the real world. It deals with the fact that there are some people that hate to see others get ahead of them in life, similar to when one of the crabs begins to climb out of the barrel, the others will reach up and drag him back down. Now regardless of whether you believe in the crabs in a barrel mentality or not, the brutal honest truth is that there are people in this world that hate to see other people bettering themselves. It is truly unfortunate when you think about it, but there's no denying how much of a fact this is. This is something we both see and hear about daily. Anytime you find someone that is doing things to better themselves, there will likely be people that are also waiting for that person to fail. Despite how bad this way of thinking may be, it can somewhat be expected from outsiders that may not know you as well. You know the kind of people that don't like you, but also don't really know you. However, in some cases, this thinking applies to people that we're the closest to as well. Regardless of who it is that may be projecting their own insecurities towards us, we must never allow others to make us feel bad for trying to better ourselves.

What's up ladies and gents? It's your guy Brad H. coming straight at you once again with another edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I'm sure most of you know how it works around here, but for those of you that are maybe visiting for the first time, I'm here to give my perspective on the various topics and thoughts that I think about in my daily life. I try to put those thought into words that I hope will not only benefit myself, but hopefully others as well. I hope that everyone has been doing well since the last post. I've been speaking about it for several posts leading up to now, but FOOTBALL IS FINALLY HERE. I'm not sure about anyone else out there, but football is what the bulk of my conversations with others for the past week or so has been about. Week one is officially in the books, and although my team lost on an awful play to end what should have been a winnable game, I'm just happy and excited that we have football back for the next few months. I may have mentioned this in the past, but this is the beginning of the time of the year that I enjoy most. Not only because of sports in general, but the fact that the weather will be starting to get cooler soon, as well as the holidays starting to approach us. I was just telling someone yesterday that it feels like people are more happier during the winter months, and I believe a big portion of that deals with Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years. I know I'm getting a bit ahead of myself, but I'm just excited. Anyway, now that I've rambled for a bit, lets go ahead and talk about what this post is mainly about, which is the importance of not allowing other people to make you feel bad for wanting to better yourself.

As I always touch on in my writings, a person's individual viewpoint on a topic will always vary. The object here isn't to focus on what is considered to be wrong or wrong; that's totally subjective and up to the individual. My goal is to hopefully give the people that read something to think about and consider further. You don't have to agree with me, and if you happen not to, that's totally fine. Your presence here is welcome regardless of whether you agree or disagree with the things I write. Like always, I'd like to take a little time and give some insight on how I came about writing on this topic. As with a good portion of the past things I've written about, this week's topic is one that I think about regularly. However, the primary reason why I decided to expand on this topic deals with my hearing of others talking about it via social media. I watch a lot of videos on Youtube, and I came across several people that mentioned something that deals with this topic in their videos. Their videos may not have dealt with this topic exactly, however, there were references in some form of the plight of dealing with negative flack from others while attempting to better yourself. Because this is a topic that I already think about and experience, as most of you probably do as well, something within me told me to address this in my own way. The crabs in a barrel mentality will never truly end in our society, but I feel that it's important for people that are trying to better themselves to persevere regardless of what others may say or think.

I'm a firm believer that for every action that a person takes, there is also a reaction. Whether it's for better or for worse, I believe that this state of mind applies to everything in life. Now going more into the context of this topic that we're dealing with, every positive action that we may take towards bettering ourselves will not always be met with a positive reaction from others. As I stated earlier, some people will not be happy for you because of their own insecurities and in some cases, people will negatively project those insecurities onto you. Most of the time, this action is conveyed solely as a way to deter you from whatever you feel is best for your own life. Now some people are able to press on despite all this, and ignoring their detractors comes relatively easy. However, for others that are facing this kind of backlash from others, blocking out the negativity from the doubters and haters can be a daunting challenge. In some cases, this can eventually lead to some people feeling bad or guilty for what they're doing to better themselves, which can stir up emotions that question whether or not we're doing the right thing. I know it sounds crazy for many, but it is a fact that there are people in this world that deal with this on a consistent basis. What's even more unfortunate is that this type of emotional abuse often comes from the ones that know us the best.

Now that we've established why there are people who will make you feel bad for doing things that will better yourself, I want to talk briefly about the primary way that others are able to do this. Going back to what I stated earlier, I believe that much of it deals with emotions. We all know that our emotions play a huge role in the things we do from a moment to moment basis. In some ways, our emotions often guide our actions and decisions. Much of this depends on what our emotional state is at that particular moment, which solidifies that our emotions have a big impact on whether we make good or bad choices. One thing that I think many of us tend to forget is that some people will often us their own emotions as a way to control us. Take this for example. How many times have you said no or didn't adhere to someone that you care for wishes, and then you found yourself changing your mind because they maybe begged or displayed emotions of disappointment towards you? We've all done this at some time or another to get what we want, and we all have fallen prey to others doing this to us. This is an example of how people use their emotions as a way to control others, and this is often the method that people will use as a way to make you feel bad for wanting to better yourself. Now I'm not saying that everyone is like this, however, this is something that we need to look out for when people are doubting something you may be doing to better yourself.

So how do you combat against people that go out of their way to make you feel bad for doing things that you think will better you? From my perspective on this topic, I just think that you have to listen to and trust your own instincts. We can't allow other people to deter us from whatever paths that we may be on towards the journey for self-improvement. Additionally, try not to fall victim to the emotionally insecurities that others will project upon you. Like I stated earlier, we live in a crabs in a barrel society, and you'll find that even the people that you're close to will sometimes subtly not be happy for you when you're changing for the better. Again, much of this is their own insecurities, so don't allow those to keep you from moving forward. Anything that you feel will better you as a person can never be truly bad. Why? Because it's your life, and only you can know what will make you happy in this life. I'll just end by quoting a lyric from a song called Sober Soldier on Stic.man's album 'The Workout'. "When you make a positive change people will judge you, some will take it personal, but don't let it budge you." Keep on pressing forward my friends, and never allow people to make you feel bad for wanting to better yourself.

Well that's all I have for this time folks, so I'm going to go ahead and end this one. Thanks once again for those of you that stopped through for another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'. Like always, I hope that some meaning and understanding was gained from this. Furthermore, I hope that someone found it inspirational and meaningful to their life. I'm all about keeping it as positive as possible here, and I try to use this blog as hub where others can find inspiration. We've arrived at the weekend, so I hope everyone enjoys and has a safe one. Alright I'm gone people, so have a good one. Until next time, I wish you all peace and positive thoughts. See you in the next one!

©2016 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Avoid The "Dream Killers" As Much As Possible.

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Doubters, naysayers, skeptics; all terms used to describe people that have little to no belief in something or someone. We've all encountered people that have expressed doubts in us or our beliefs, and we've also been on the other side of the fence where we've expressed doubts in others. There will always be reasons for expressing doubt about various things in life and for a good portion of those reasons, those doubts will be justifiable. There is also another term used by many these days to describe the naysayers and nonbelievers. Many people nowadays refer to them as being "dream killers". While we can't control what others say or think, we can definitely control how much we're around them, as well as how much we reveal to them. From my perspective, dream killers should be avoided as much as possible.

Hello folks, and welcome to another one of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! If you're giving this post a look at this moment, I want you to know that I really appreciate it. So for the topic this time around, we're talking about the importance of avoiding those people that have been coined as being "dream killers" out there. So what is the exact definition of a dream killer? Well to be quite honest, I'm not sure if there is a true definition for this term. However, what I do know is that a dream killer and a doubter are pretty much one in the same. They're almost like snakes; they come in different shapes, sizes and colors but at the end of the day, they're still the same scaly creatures that most of us dislike. Now with that said, there is also what I would consider to be a slight difference between your average skeptic and a dream killer.

Now in my personal opinion, a dream killer is a bit different from the standard doubter in that a dream killer is likely a person that we're extremely close to. A dream killer can come in the disguise of a friend, but they're often the people that we're the closet to and know us the best; our family. It's somewhat odd when you really think about it right? Sometimes (not always), the very people that we believe should be our biggest supporters, be the main ones that can hinder us from seeing our own dreams. It can indeed be an odd conundrum to process, but it is something that we see happening everyday in our society. So what is the biggest trait that a dream killer exhibits? From my perspective, a dream killer is someone that shoots down a vision that you may have for yourself, mainly because they cannot see it for themselves.

When I think of things that a dream killer may say, I think of something saying; "I don't think you should do that, it'll never work." How many times have we heard someone say something along these lines; "You're too old to accomplish that?" Again, these are the people that don't believe in your vision, because they're not willing to be open minded enough. Now I'm not implying that anyone that is close to us that may be dubbed a dream killer doesn't mean us well. I think we can all agree that most of our family and loved ones want to see us happy. However, in some cases, the people closet to us often put their own happiness ahead of ours. This is a price that comes at our own personal expense, and we're the ones that end up footing a bill called unhappiness.

One example that sticks out to me involves a boxing match that took place over 20 years ago. Back in late 1994, a then 45 year old George Foreman decided to seek a chance at the world heavyweight championship in the sport of boxing. Most of George's advisers, family and friends, along with the media thought he was going through a midlife crisis for wanting to fight a young champion in Michael Moorer. Michael Moorer was 19 years younger than Foreman at the time. As we know from history, Foreman went on to defeat Moorer by knockout, and thus became the oldest athlete to win a major title in any sport. That mark has since been passed, but the main point that I'm trying to get across is that although everyone else couldn't see Foreman's vision, he was able to see it for himself. Just imagine how George would feel now if he hadn't followed his dream, and ended up listening to those that thought he was making a mistake. He probably would be living the rest of his life with a lot of "what ifs?"

Whether you want to refer to them as dream killers, naysayers, skeptics or all of the above, try to limit your time around these people as much as possible. Just because a person doesn't see nor share in your vision, doesn't mean its not the right thing for YOU to do. If you can see it for yourself, then that's all that ultimately matters. Never expect everyone to share your dreams and aspirations, but also be conscience and open minded enough to consider what those closet to you think. Finally, if you're one of these dream killers out here in the world, try not to hinder or limit someone else. Even if you don't agree with their dreams or something they want to do, try to support them and their goals as much as possible. They'll appreciate it in the end, and your support just may be what they need to fulfill their dream.

Alright, I think I've rambled on for enough time, so I'm going to end this edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'. As always, I hope there is some meaning and understanding gained from this. I thank those of you that have stopped by, and I'll see you all in the next one. Peace!

©2015 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

What Other People Think About You and Your Life Is Their Business, Not Yours!

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Many of the thoughts and inspirations that I draw upon come from some of the motivational speakers that I enjoy listening to. One of my favorite motivational speakers to listen to is a man named Les Brown. Some of you may be familiar with him already. I haven't been up on Mr. Brown's work all that long, only for maybe a year or so. However, during the short span of time that I've become familiar with him, I've made an attempt to listen to as many of his speeches as I can. One of my favorite Les Brown speeches is his speech titled 'It's Possible'. Although I found the entire speech to be both informative and inspiring, there was something that Mr. Brown spoke during that speech that I thought would be a good title for this post. What's good folks? It's ya boy Brad H. back at you again with another edition of 'Brad H's. Perspective'.

I'm not going to go into many of the details of Les Brown's speech because to be honest, an entire book could probably be written about the particular speech that I'm referring to. However, what I plan on doing is using the quote from Les Brown that I'm going to use as the basis in this blog post, and relating it to how so many of us live our lives. Most of us may try to deny it, but the honest truth is that too many of us care about what other people think of us and our lives. We often hear people saying that they don't care what others think of them, but many of the people that constantly say this are the main ones making the hardest efforts to impress other people. Don't believe me? How many people do you know that go out of their way to purchase things that they probably don't really need, but their primary motivation for buying these things is that they're hoping to impress someone. Oh yea, we can't forget about the people that go way out of their way in attempts to make other people jealous.

It's amazing how we as people sometime do things for all the wrong reasons. Think about it for a second; a person buying something to show off and floss to a group of people that doesn't even like them. Is there even much logic in that? Whatever happened to just being yourself, and doing things because doing it made you happy? Why are people so hellbent on fitting in and trying to impress others? I believe that we as people in general want to feel like we're accepted by others. As I mentioned in a previous post, being the individual that you really are can sometimes be a lonely road to travel down, and not everyone that you encounter is going to like you, nor are they always going to understand you. In fact, regardless as to how good or bad of a person that you believe that you are, people are always going to have an opinion about you and your lifestyle, and in many cases, their opinions aren't going to be good ones. Guess what though; what other people think of you and your life is their business, not yours.

You may wonder to yourself; why do I say it's their business and not yours? Well like they say, your life is called your life because it's yours to live. No one can live for you, nor are they responsible for your happiness. The way that you decide to live your life, and what you want to do with your life is all on you. Therefore, how or what others perceive of you and your your life isn't any concern of yours, that's all on them. Our only concern should be doing the things that make ourselves happy. We have to continue to remind ourselves that true happiness is living life on your own terms, rather than constantly caring about what others think of you.

Now of course, there are some instances where someone else's opinion of you may hold some weight. When I think of caring about what others think, I mainly think of family members and close friends. In most cases, these are the people that we truly know care about us, so we tend to value their opinions. There's a big difference between worrying about what people whom have never done anything to help, uplift, or support you in any way think about you, compared to those who have proven themselves. One of the biggest issues we face is that many of us put too much stock into caring about those who shouldn't matter, and not enough on the ones that do. I think that pretty much about wraps it up for this 'Brad H's. Perspective' post.

The key point that I want to drive home is that we shouldn't be overly concerned about what people think in regards to our lives. My thinking on this especially applies to the people that only have negative opinions and thoughts of you, but have never provided any ideas or support to help take your life to the next level. In fact, it's probably better to remove those kind of people out of your life completely. As with my other posts, I want to say that everything that I've written about only applies to myself. Just view it as advice that you can use however you see fit. Whether you decide to use it or not, I appreciate those of you that take out the time to stop by. I'll see you in the next post. Peace!

There's No Single Way to React To Facing Problems. (Weathering the Storms of Life).

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Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. once said: "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." Personally, this is one of my favorite quotes from Dr. King, as I think it personifies the potential obstacles we as people are going to face in life. Hard times, struggles, difficulties, we all have faced them before, and the uncertainty of what the future possibly holds in regards to these words can be enough to create even more worry within us. Welcome to another posting of 'Brad H's. Perspective'.

How many of us are truly able to keep a smile on our face when we're facing rough times? How many of us are able to keep our heads held high through constant difficulties? There are many people that tout the importance of doing these things when we're facing trials and frustrations. However, I think it's fair to question where most of these people are at in their lives when they are saying these things. Don't get me wrong, I don't believe there's anything wrong with wanting to send positive vibes to others when they're down. But, isn't it easy for someone that is completely happy and content with their lives to tell someone else to be positive?

It is indeed true that it's not difficult to all to maintain a level of optimism and happiness when things are going good. Whenever things are going great in someone's life, they more than likely will be an overall happy individual. When someone is truly happy, the degree of happiness they feel is often clear for others to see. Whatever may be going on in someone's life - whether good or bad is often the determining factor in a person's mood and how happy or sad they will be. But what do many of us do whenever something unfortunate happens that causes our world to temporarily spin out of control? Do we always stay positive no matter what happens? Do we fold up and run from problems? Reactions vary from person to person, but the changing tides of life can be one of the dictating factors of how we feel.

A few months back, I posted a blog post about striking a balance in life. That particular post dealt with maintaining a positive mindset, but also being aware of the negative forces that life often brings. So how does the Dr. King quote, along with everything I've mentioned thus far tie in with this post? Well, I'm here to tell anyone who needs to hear it that it's okay for life to beat us down at times. No one should be made to feel that they're weak if life drags them down from time to time. We're not perfect and no matter how tough a person is, life always has a way of humbling every single one of us.

While I do think it's important to smile and keep our heads held high no matter what life brings, I also believe it's okay to allow ourselves to welcome the difficulties that life can bring. Going through tough scenarios that test what we're made of have a way of showing us new things about ourselves. They can also be a stepping stone that allows us to leap and grow to handle circumstances better in the future. That's what life is all about; growing, learning, and becoming better.

So to sum up the theme of this post, I think it's okay to allow the shortfalls of life to affect us. The important factor is that we grow from them, and not allow them to bring and keep us down completely. Always try to keep moving forward no matter what is happening around you, but don't allow others to make you feel bad about how you handle what you go through in life. We're all different, and how I handle a situation may be different from how the next person handles it. Well that's all for this posting of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'. I hope you enjoyed, and we'll see you in the next post. Peace!

Living for ourselves.

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Hello once again. I go by the name of Brad H., and I thank you for taking the time to read my post. Hope all is well with anyone who takes out the time to read this. Tonight I want to write about something that has been on my mind the last week or so. Well first I want to ask as question. How many of us are really living for ourselves? What do I mean when I say living for ourselves? Are you, or have you been in a situation where you felt pressured by someone else to do something you really didn't want? Maybe it was a family member, a spouse, or someone you consider a friend. I'm willing to be that almost all of us have been in this situation at one point or another.

I know that we sometimes have to do things we don't like. That is just life in general. However, it's important to remember that we must live for ourselves. We only get one opportunity, and one shot at this thing called life. We must make OURSELVES as happy as we possibly can. When it's over, it's over with. Some of my family members probably wonder why I am so defiant about certain things they ask of me. It's because I want to do things on my own terms. Not because I'm conforming to what someone else wants. There's a song by a hip hop artist named Buff1 called "Once". One of the lines in the song goes; "They call it your life, cause it's yours to live". That right there sums it all up. I challenge anyone who reads this who feels like they are living for others and not themselves, to take the challenge and rise up and do YOU! I struggle with this sometimes myself. I'm challenging myself as well to do this. My posts are not just about talking to other people, but myself as well. Lets focus on being better people, and living OUR lives to the fullest. Well I'm going to sign off for now. I hope you enjoyed this, and I hope someone can relate to what I'm saying.

I'll be back soon with more topics to discuss. Again I hope all is well with everyone. Peace, love, and blessings to all.