Why We Shouldn't Let The Fear Of Past Mistakes Paralyze Us For Future Decisions.

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To be alive is to know that everyone makes bad decisions from time to time. No matter how much we try to avoid mistakes and failures, the truth is that for as long as we're alive, mistakes are going to happen. Although this has been proven many times throughout most of our lives, many of us just can't seem to shake this fact. Is it because we're too hard on ourselves? Maybe we have allowed a society that tends to put a lot of emphasis on failure to drive our desire to be perfect all the time. Maybe it could be a combination of both, or even some other reasons for this, but though perfection is something that is unattainable, it is something that we still strive for. Probably one of, if not one the biggest potential pitfalls to not wanting to make mistakes deals with the idea that past mistakes can often hinder us from making choices in the future. This is something that a good many people can probably relate to, as we've all had to make choices in our lives that didn't turn out to be the outcome(s) that we may have desired. This is something that if it begins to happen quite frequently, or more often than we'd like to see, it can often lead to us becoming indecisive, which can lead to paralyzing fear for the potential future decisions that we're going to face. I have already pointed to how bad this is and for this week's topic, we're going to be addressing why we shouldn't let fear of the past affect our futures.

Hello once again ladies and gentlemen! It is your boy Brad H. back at it once again, and I'd like to once again welcome everyone out there to another edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am back in the building for another week of inspiration and knowledge that will hopefully inspire myself and others to continue striving to be the best versions of ourselves. This is the second topic for the still new year of 2018, so I wanna know how are those resolutions coming along? I'm pretty sure that most of you have already reneged on them huh? I'm just kidding, but I hope that those of you that have made those resolutions for 2018 are sticking to them so far. So before getting into this week's topic, I'd like to give my thoughts on something that I'm sure many of you that are sports fans are following; the NFL playoffs. After two weeks of games, we are officially down to the final four teams. This weekend we have the Jacksonville(Sacksonville) Jaguars taking on the New England Patriots, and the Minnesota Vikings going up against the Philadelphia Eagles. Before getting into my prediction, man what an ending that was to the New Orleans Saints and Vikings game huh? I'm sure that most people that are fans of the Saints will probably disagree, but that was a great game regardless of who won in my opinion. So for the games this weekend, I'm going to predict that the Patriots will beat the Jaguars. It think it will be a good hard fought game, and I think Jacksonville will give the Patriots a hard time. However, it is hard to go against the experience the Patriots have. I'll be pulling for the Jaguars, but I think they lose. In the other game, I think the Vikings will take out the Eagles. They're riding on the momentum of that thrilling ending last week, plus they have the home-field advantage. I think the Eagles luck runs out this week. Those are just my brief predictions. I could be wrong, so lets see what happens. Alright, it is now time to get into the main topic for the week of past mistakes and fear of future decisions.

As with the usual formula I tend to use, I'd like to go ahead and mention that we all have different views and opinions. I don't expect everyone to agree with me on this or any of the other topics that I choose to discuss on here. The primary objective here isn't to force my beliefs on anyone, but rather to hopefully encourage others to think about various topics in ways that they may not have before. One of the beauties of life is being able to interact with others, and find yourself walking away from that interaction feeling like you gained something that you didn't know beforehand. That is the same idea that I'm trying to push on here. If you don't happen to agree with me on this or any of the other topics, that is perfectly fine and well within your right to do so. Whatever your beliefs may be, I am still appreciative of those that take a little bit of time out of your day to see what I'm thinking about. So how did I arrive at wanting to address the topic of past mistakes and fear for future decisions? I had a discussion last week with my sister where I kinda touched on this. It wasn't anything that was planned or intentional, it was just something that came to my mind while we were talking. Since then it has kinda stayed in my mind, so I figured it would be a good theme to base this week's inspiration around. Some of what I'm going to address may not apply to many of you, but I do hope that it does provide some inspiration for those that maybe find themselves being indecisive because of past failures.

Have you ever wondered why so many of us tend to beat ourselves up for the mistakes that we make? As I mentioned earlier, to be alive is to make mistakes, which means that mistakes and bad choices are due to happen sometimes. We're all prone to making mistakes, yet we often judge and ridicule others for the mistakes they make. Now I suppose I can understand why people coming down harder on people that make the same mistakes constantly. If you make the same mistakes over and over again, then you likely aren't learning anything, and I see mistakes as lessons that should have a takeaway from them. However, teasing and picking on another person for not knowing something or finding themselves in a silly moment isn't good in my opinion. I believe much of the fear that comes along with not making mistakes deals with the idea of judgement from previous mishaps. There are many people that aren't easily able to brush off other people that pass judgement on us. I'm going to use the example of basketball to setup the point that I'm making. Just imagine a high school basketball player that blows a wide open layup during a game, and this same student gets picked on by his peers the next day at school. If he or she isn't able to mentally block out that criticism, they will probably do everything in their ability to avoid putting themselves in that kind of situation during future games. They are allowing the fear of a past mistake to paralyze their future. Though basketball is more small scale thinking, I think this was a decent example to compare to the bigger picture of mistakes for life in general.

Now I stated in the previous paragraph that I view mistakes as lessons, and while I do believe this wholeheartedly, I also believe they're not automatic lessons that we just instantly pick up on. Similar to studying for a test or wanting to learn something new in your life, I believe that the mistakes that we make throughout our lives need to be broken down and analyzed if they're to be learned from. Always keep in mind that mistakes will happen time and time again, but they'll likely happen even more often if we're not make a conscious attempt to learn from them. Now it is normal to feel fear and anxiety for the future when you've made bad choices in the past before. You find that you're constantly questioning whether or not you will do the right thing next time, which can lead to a lot of indecisiveness. However, regardless of how afraid we may find ourselves being for the upcoming choices we may have to make in our lives, the fact remains that mistakes of the past can lead to growth, and from my perspective, the best way to grow as a person is to embrace your mistakes. Furthermore, just because you've made mistakes in the past does not mean that past outcomes will result in the future. Yes it is important to learn from mistakes and mishaps, but using them as a benchmark for our futures only keeps us afraid. This is exactly why I feel that so many of us hate to make decisions, because we're still stuck on bad choices we've made in the past. Growth indeed does comes from mistakes, but making mistakes doesn't mean that we shouldn't move forward.

So why shouldn't we allow the fear of past mistakes to paralyze us for the future decisions? There could be a variety of ways to answer this and much of it honestly depends on a person's mode of thinking. However, from my personal perspective on this, the simple answer is that the past is the past, and the past doesn't, nor should it be the primary determinant of what the future may be. If you made a decision in the past that turned out not to be in your favor, it happened the way it did for a reason. The important thing is that you learn and grow from whatever it was. Also, we have to keep in mind that we're not machines, therefore regardless of how hard we may try to prevent potential mistakes of the future, there will always be a human element that exists. I've mentioned it a couple of times already in this post, but I don't think it can be rehashed enough. We are all humans here, so we're all going to be flawed, which means that we're going to make mistakes whether we want to or not. While I do believe that mistakes can be costly depending on what it may be, I also believe that mistakes are a necessity for life. We can't always be right about everything all the time, so why should we believe that we're never supposed to fail at something? So to sum up; our past is just that, the past. Lets learn from our mistakes going forward, and don't allow bad decisions in the past to affect our future. Lets work on developing the confidence in ourselves that is required to make the best choices for ourselves, but also be mindful that we're humans that should always allow room for errors.

Well we have arrived at the conclusion of another topic for the week. It is time to sign off for now, but I'll be back soon. I'd like to thank everyone once again that came through for another topic of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! As I always mention before closing, I hope that there was some meaning and understanding that could be gained from this, as well as the other topics I address on here. If you have any comments or feedback, feel free to drop them down in the comments. You can also follow me on Twitter @BradrickH if you'd like. I hope that 2018 is treating you all well so far, and I hope that you all are having a great weekend. Big Sunday in the NFL tomorrow, so I hope those of you that are football fans enjoy. Take care everyone, and I'll see you all in the next one! Peace!

©2018 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Nobody Should Be Above Criticism.

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In life, there is always going to be a person or group of people that we pledge our loyalties to. Often times, loyalty is normally attributed to our family members, however, there are also friends and people that we meet throughout our lives that we deem worthy of being loyal to. In essence, the true meaning of loyalty can be viewed as something universal; not only limited to family and friends, but it can also be given to nearly anything regardless if it's a brand, entertainer, or city. The concept of having loyalty or loyal individuals in our lives is a crucial aspect of life, as we always desire to have those people that will be in your corner no matter what life brings. With all of that said, I think there are too many of us allowing people to get away with certain behaviors that could be considered as wrong, but because of our loyalty to these people, we tend let them off the hook so to speak. This is another edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'.

What's good people? Hope all is well with everyone. It's me Bradrick coming back at you again after another long hiatus. I know my being on these hiatuses seems to becoming a common theme, and I apologize for that. It's just that sometimes in life, there are other priorities that must be taken care of ahead of others. At any rate, I'm back again with another topic that has been on my mind as of late. For some of you, this particular topic may not make a lot of sense, or you may view my thoughts on it as being wrong. There are some people that believe there's no in between when it comes to being loyal to something or someone, and if that's your belief, that's totally fine with me. While I believe that there is some truth to that, I also believe that no one single person should be above criticism, or being called out for certain things they do.

Picture this scenario; you've been friends with someone for many years, and you both are extremely loyal to one another. Whenever you need each other to be there, it's not even a question. You both have a tight-knit, close relationship with each other. Now lets say that your friend does or says something that you disagree with. I'm not going to go in-depth and come up with something that the person could have done, but lets just say it's something bad and deep down you disagree with what they done. Maybe something this friend said doesn't necessarily align with your personal beliefs. As a friend you want to have their back and give them support, but on the other hand, you want them to know how disappointed you are with them. What's worse is that you know if you reveal to them how you really feel about their actions, you know that they'll lash out at you and say that you're not being a real friend to them. Get where I'm going with this?

This is a dilemma that we all find ourselves in from time to time. The situation of having the choice to do what we feel is right in our eyes vs. supporting something or someone that we feel loyal to. Well from my perspective, and this is a perspective that I've developed in the last few years or so, nobody; regardless of who it is, should be above criticism. See in most people's eyes, being loyal to someone means supporting them no matter what they do, even if it's something that we don't agree with. No matter how close you are to someone, disagreements are bound to happen eventually. I believe it's very important to be loyal to those we feel are worthy of having our loyalty, however, being a truly loyal person also means having the ability to call out those we care about on the things we feel they're doing wrong, even if they don't necessarily like it. We've gotten to a point where we allow others to use the word "loyalty" as a handicap to make people feel bad for saying what they truly feel.

This is a trend that we're seeing a lot of in politics, sports, and many other areas of life. Now in my opinion, lets use a good example of what loyalty truly means. One situation that I can think of is while we were growing up as children, didn't our parents get on us whenever we done something wrong? It didn't mean that they didn't love us or care, it just meant that they were trying to teach us right from wrong. Even as adults, the learning process will always continue, and sometimes it takes a close friend or relative's perspective to call us out on certain things. It doesn't always mean that they're not a real friend, nor that they're not being loyal to us. Criticism can sting sometimes, and I'm in no way saying that anyone should be constantly criticized. All I'm saying is that regardless of how close we are to someone, nobody should be above criticism if it's necessary. Loyalty has nothing to do with, nor should it be limited to not criticizing the actions of someone if they're wrong. You can be loyal to anything, but that doesn't mean you have to agree or co-sign all the time. Again, regardless of who it is, in the end, right is right and wrong is wrong.

Alright, I'm going to go ahead and sign off for this edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'. Like always, I appreciate those of you who stop by and read these posts. As with all of my posts, everything that I mentioned applies only to myself and how I strive to live. I'm in no way saying that my perspective or way of thinking is how anyone else should think. If any meaning and understanding is gained from this, that's always an added bonus. Well I hope everyone has a great rest of the week, and I'll see you in the next post. Peace!