Can Someone Else Really Know What Is Truly Best For You?

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Throughout your journey of life, how many times have people in some many ways tried telling you what is best for you? Probably more times than you can count right? When it comes to people telling you what they may feel is best for you, most people do it in subtle ways. Nearly every one of us can relate to the feeling of telling another person how you feel about something and being told in response that you shouldn't do that. Something that I pointed out a few times in the most recent topic that I covered was the idea that while most of the times when people try to keep us from doing something that we want to do is often for honorable reasons, there are also some occasions where the discouragement is coming from a more questionable place. Finding that someone with whom's opinion you value isn't quite in line with what you believe can often be a disheartening thing for some people to deal with. In some cases that are more extreme, it can even cause friction that leads to potentially damaging the relationship. I do realize that in certain circumstances that something like this cannot be avoided. However, the perspective that I'm coming from encourages people to be more tolerant of the ideas of others so these kind of often irreversible situations can be avoided. The question as to whether or not another person can truly know what is best for you is one that will have varying opinions. There are certain circumstances where a person may be so emotionally attached to someone or something that they're not able to rationally see things for what they are in that situation. I believe that those type of circumstances probably call for an outside source to intervene in order to put things into perspective for whom it may apply to. However, I want to come from a perspective that most of us can relate to when it comes to the question; can people really know what is truly best for you?

What's going on everybody? This is ya boy Brad H. back once again, so go and tell a friend. I'm just kidding, but I'd like to welcome everyone that came back through to another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'. I am back for another week to give my thoughts on a topic that I feel would be valuable to the lives of others. I also hope that within the context of the topic that I have chosen for the week that it will give us all some wisdom and motivation to keep on moving forward in our lives. I hope that everyone has been doing pretty well since the last post. If that hasn't been your reality as of late, I hope that things will get better and improve for you. So for my soapbox for this week, I'd like to give a few thoughts on how everything in this world has become so politicized. Now politics is something that I choose not to talk about much on here. My reasoning for this comes from the fact that I prefer this blog to be a place of positive thinking and positive vibes. The fact is that controversial topics like religion and politics often create tension and hate. But I wanna say that we as people have to do better when it comes to making everything political. I know and understand that politics plays a big role in our country and our identity. However, not every little thing has to be turned into something political. I think it is pretty sad when things that are supposed to enjoyed have turned so politicized that the the things themselves are no longer the focus. I believe that it says a lot about our nation when people try and bring awareness to something, and are vilified for it. We have to focus more on what people are trying to bring awareness to, and stop trying to make these things about left or right. I get that people only want to talk and not listen, but in order for there to be progress, we have to learn how to listen more. That's pretty much all I wanna say about that, so lets go ahead and transition into this week's topic of whether someone else can truly know what is best for you.

Before getting into the topic that I'm covering for this installment, I'd like to go ahead and give the usual disclaimer that I mention before every topic. We all have different outlooks and views on life. The primary goal with this topic, as well as the others isn't to focus on what we think is right or wrong. The main focus is to offer some insight that will not only help keep us motivated, but to also encourage us to be deeper thinkers when it comes to the various aspects of life. As always, I do not expect everyone to agree with me. However, whatever you may think or feel about my opinions whether it is for good or bad, I do appreciate everyone that takes out a little bit of their time to read up on my thoughts. So how did I arrive at the topic of whether or not others can really know what is truly best for us? This topic came to my mind due to a conversation with my sister last week. I know that it probably feels like I often get ideas for topics to discuss from my sister, but I will admit it is the truth. I think much of it deals with the idea that a good portion of the talks I have with her are deep and thoughtful discussions. That is one of the reasons why she is probably my favorite person to talk with when it comes to life. Anyway, at some point during the talk that we were having, I recall mentioning how people don't always know what is best for you. Not soon after saying that, I thought to myself that this would be something good to address in the next blog post. I don't know about anyone else, but I think it is truly great how an idea can just come to you from some of the things that we deem as being so small. So with that being said, I wanna give thanks to my sister for the talk that helped give birth to this idea in my head. Beyond just that, I think that this is a topic that could possibly expand a bit more upon the topic that I covered in the last post. Hopefully you all have read that post already, but in case that you have not, it is always just below.

One of the many things that I've talked about on here, as well as in my everyday life is the idea that people often project their own life and insecurities onto others. What does it mean when someone does this? Imagine that there is something in your life that you want to do or achieve. It can be or relate to anything, but for the sake of having an example, lets just say that you want to go to a specific college when you graduate from high school. Now lets say that you come from a family that didn't have anyone else that went to college. These chose another path to go with their life that didn't involve academics, but that's not what you want for yourself. Now imagine that upon informing your family on your plans, they tell you that they don't believe that going to college is a good idea. They believe that picking up a trade or doing something that provides a little more stability is the better option compared to spending money to go to college. This is an example of how other people project their own life onto others. How so, you may wonder? The family that doesn't entirely support your decision to want to attend college never went to college, so the idea of taking this route is likely foreign to them. However, just because they don't see or have the same vision that you may have doesn't mean that you are wrong for wanting to go to college. As I touched on in the most recent topic on not holding people back from living their life, the fact that they don't support your decision doesn't mean that they're bad people, nor that it means that they don't want what is best for you. It's just an example of how when a person didn't do or can't see something for themselves, they also think that isn't the direction for you either. This is an example of how people project their own lives onto others. Again, this can be likened to any aspect of life; I just used the college thing as an example. The point is that situations such as this can put you at odds with others, and if you're not mentally strong enough to understand what is going on, you may find yourself being deterred by others.

From my perspective, and I'm sure that many of you will agree with me when I say this, but one of the biggest things in this life to live with is regret. If you have lived a number of years on this Earth regardless of how many years it may be, you have likely had moments where you've looked back at something you either did or didn't do that makes you feel regret. Now how does regret tie in with whether or not another person knows what is best for you? Well as I stated recently, a person that maybe isn't mentally strong enough, or maybe hasn't reached the mental capacity to fully think for themselves can be deterred more easily by other people. If you find yourself in situations where you are have to rely on other people to make decisions for you on how you should live your own life, you'll likely end up having to live with regret in the future. Now again, I want to stress that often times when other people offer their opinions on what you should do within the circumstances that you're dealing with in your life, they're coming from a place of meaning well. I don't wanna make it appear as if I am trying to vilify people that may genuinely care for us. However, the point that I'm trying to get across is that if you happen to just go along with whatever your peers or elders think you should do, you probably won't ruffle too many feathers, and whatever suggestions they have may even work out for you in the end. But keep in mind that not ruffling feathers or just going with the program when the program isn't something that you truly want to do can have consequences for your life. Instead of you doing what you want to do and live on your own terms, you are likely pretending to be someone that you're not. How can a person truly be happy if they're not able to be themselves and do the things they enjoy? This is when regret can settle into a person's life. The fact of the matter is that regardless of how much we may try to avoid stirring the pot a bit when it comes to pleasing others, it is inevitable that we will. It is just impossible to make everyone happy in this life, which is why you have to prioritize your own happiness.

So can someone else truly know what is best for you? From my perspective on this topic, I'd have to say the answer is no. Now there are circumstances where people may care for you and want what is best for you, but there is a difference between wanting what is best for a person and knowing what is best for a person. I think much of our society gets the two confused. Now if I tell someone that I want what is best for them, I'm going from a place of supporting whatever it is they desire. I don't even have to know what that may be, but I'm simply saying that I want you to accomplish whatever your heart desires. However, if I say that I know what is best for you, then I'm basically projecting my own life onto you and saying that what I feel is best for me can also be what is best for you. Now I don't have any hardcore evidence or numbers to back up what I'm about to say, but I think a good number of people are part of the latter of the two. Again, I think that it is coming from a good place most of the time, but we also know that control can play a factor as well. That's a whole other topic for another day, so I'll leave that as is for now. Now if you're a person that feels different than I do when it comes to this topic, that is totally fine, and I'd love to see you leave a comment on why you may feel otherwise. The biggest thing that I'm hoping others can draw from this is that while it is good to seek out counseling and advice from people that we trust, you have to also be the captain on your own ship at times. Because we only get one life to live and no one else can live for us, no other person can truly know what is best for you. We often hear about how many of the answers that we're seeking for our lives are often already inside of us. I personally believe that this is true, but sometimes it takes a little bit of soul searching to find those answers. Always be humble and open the advice of others, but remember that it is called your life, because it's yours to live.

I think that I have said enough for this go round, so I'm going to go ahead and close this one out. Like always, I hope that I was able to express myself in a manner that people can relate to. My name is Bradrick H., and this has been another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! As always, I want to give a big thank you and props to everyone that consistently has stopped by. If you have any comments or feedback to give, please feel free to do so. You can also find me on Twitter @BradrickH. I hope you all enjoy the weekend. Football is right around the corner, so I know all of your sports fan out there are pretty geek'd for that. I know that I am. I wish you all a great week ahead, and I'll see you all in the next installment. Till then, take care of yourselves, and keep moving forward. Peace!

©2018 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

The Pros and Cons of Life, and Learning to Take the Good With the Bad.

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"I love it when a plan comes together." Remember that classic line from the 'A-Team' television show? If not, then don't fret, as that quote has little to do with this week's topic. Just thought I'd throw it in there for nostalgic purposes. Although I do love a well thought out plan in general, I also love whenever I come across a topic or discussion that gives me something to think more in depth about. Some people say that thinking too much can be a bad thing, and I do agree with that to some extent. However, when we're thinking about things that can maybe challenge some of our views and help us to see the world a bit differently, then I don't necessarily see it as such a bad thing. I came across a Youtube video awhile back that really got me to thinking about life and the pros and cons that come along with life. Viewing this particular video kinda got my mind to thinking a bit and when that starts happening, it means that it's time for another 'Brad H.'s Perspective' post.

What's up good people? Brad H. back at you once again with another blog post. Hope everyone is doing well and continuing to maintain. So this week we'll be talking about the pros and cons of life, and how we sometimes just have to take the good with the bad. I think that's sometimes important just for our sanity ya digg? Since every single choice that a person will make throughout their lives will have consequences, I felt like this would be a good topic to give my thoughts on. Alright then, lets go ahead and get into the meat of this post. Now we're all aware that the majority of people in this world bask in the glory whenever they do something deemed as good, or whenever something good happens in their favor. Everything and everyone is happy whenever life is going good right?

This way of thinking is quite normal, as most humans from an emotional standpoint often respond to whatever is going on around them. When things are good people are generally happy, and when things aren't so good, people generally feel down and out right? Of course this doesn't apply to everyone. There are always people in this world that are going to find a way to be happy regardless of what is going on. On the flip side, there's always going to be those that see the worst no matter what. I personally think that we don't always fully grasp the true understanding of the pros and cons that come with life, especially when they relate to the choices and decisions that we make in life. It appears that most of us want only the pros when it comes to the decisions we make, but continuously gripe and complain about the cons that come along with our choices. I mean it's all fine and dandy to feel on top of the world when life is good, and it's also quite normal to feel down and out when things aren't going so well. However, we have to learn to be able to take the good with the bad, and realize that there are pros and cons to every choice that we make.

So what does it mean when someone says that there both are pros and cons with every choice that a person makes? Well it all boils down to one thing, and people that prefer not to take the good with the bad may not like this. The truth is there is no single decision in life that is all pro or all con. With every choice that's made, whether it's for the better or not, there's always going to be some kind of downside that comes along with it. Here's a prime example. Lets say that a person that hasn't been working out makes the decision to start going to the gym. This is definitely a choice that would be received as being positive by most people. You're making the effort to get healthier, and that's a good thing. However, in order to achieve your goal of being more healthier and looking more toned, you're going to have to put your body through some pain, which would probably be viewed as as one of the cons for the person that's enduring it. Some people love looking and feeling great, but hate the pain that they have to go through in order to get there.

It's been said time and time again, but the fact remains; we as people complain way too much. We often complain about the smallest of things, which most of the time are situations that we ultimately create for ourselves. We only want to be bothered with and take credit for the good in life, but we're so quick to run away from and reject the bad, especially when it's of our own doing. You ever notice how a lot of politicians and celebrities tend to be on their high horse when they're on top of the world, but try to humanize themselves whenever they makes mistakes like every human-being does? Pros and cons are all a part of life, and I think that people who really understand that are the people that have the potential to be well balanced in life.

I think I'm going to go ahead and end this week's post, so I'm going to close by restating that life is all about pros and cons. Every single decision that you make, regardless of how much it benefits you, will likely have a con that comes along with it. Instead of complaining about the cons that come along with the decisions that you have to make, embrace them as they are ultimately the result of something you chose. Just remember that you can't have it both ways in life. There will always be both a gift and a curse that comes from your decisions. All in all, you just have to be able to embrace both the good and bad things that can happen in life, and find a way for yourself to mentally find a balance.

Well that's it for this weeks edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'. As always, everything that I've mentioned applies to myself and how I aim to live my life. Whether you found some meaning and understanding from it or not, I appreciate you for taking out the time to read it. Alright, we're signing off for this week, so I'll see you in the next post. Spring is upon us, so try to get out and enjoy the weather. Till next time, peace!

Living for ourselves.

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Hello once again. I go by the name of Brad H., and I thank you for taking the time to read my post. Hope all is well with anyone who takes out the time to read this. Tonight I want to write about something that has been on my mind the last week or so. Well first I want to ask as question. How many of us are really living for ourselves? What do I mean when I say living for ourselves? Are you, or have you been in a situation where you felt pressured by someone else to do something you really didn't want? Maybe it was a family member, a spouse, or someone you consider a friend. I'm willing to be that almost all of us have been in this situation at one point or another.

I know that we sometimes have to do things we don't like. That is just life in general. However, it's important to remember that we must live for ourselves. We only get one opportunity, and one shot at this thing called life. We must make OURSELVES as happy as we possibly can. When it's over, it's over with. Some of my family members probably wonder why I am so defiant about certain things they ask of me. It's because I want to do things on my own terms. Not because I'm conforming to what someone else wants. There's a song by a hip hop artist named Buff1 called "Once". One of the lines in the song goes; "They call it your life, cause it's yours to live". That right there sums it all up. I challenge anyone who reads this who feels like they are living for others and not themselves, to take the challenge and rise up and do YOU! I struggle with this sometimes myself. I'm challenging myself as well to do this. My posts are not just about talking to other people, but myself as well. Lets focus on being better people, and living OUR lives to the fullest. Well I'm going to sign off for now. I hope you enjoyed this, and I hope someone can relate to what I'm saying.

I'll be back soon with more topics to discuss. Again I hope all is well with everyone. Peace, love, and blessings to all.