Why We Shouldn't Let The Fear Of Past Mistakes Paralyze Us For Future Decisions.

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To be alive is to know that everyone makes bad decisions from time to time. No matter how much we try to avoid mistakes and failures, the truth is that for as long as we're alive, mistakes are going to happen. Although this has been proven many times throughout most of our lives, many of us just can't seem to shake this fact. Is it because we're too hard on ourselves? Maybe we have allowed a society that tends to put a lot of emphasis on failure to drive our desire to be perfect all the time. Maybe it could be a combination of both, or even some other reasons for this, but though perfection is something that is unattainable, it is something that we still strive for. Probably one of, if not one the biggest potential pitfalls to not wanting to make mistakes deals with the idea that past mistakes can often hinder us from making choices in the future. This is something that a good many people can probably relate to, as we've all had to make choices in our lives that didn't turn out to be the outcome(s) that we may have desired. This is something that if it begins to happen quite frequently, or more often than we'd like to see, it can often lead to us becoming indecisive, which can lead to paralyzing fear for the potential future decisions that we're going to face. I have already pointed to how bad this is and for this week's topic, we're going to be addressing why we shouldn't let fear of the past affect our futures.

Hello once again ladies and gentlemen! It is your boy Brad H. back at it once again, and I'd like to once again welcome everyone out there to another edition of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am back in the building for another week of inspiration and knowledge that will hopefully inspire myself and others to continue striving to be the best versions of ourselves. This is the second topic for the still new year of 2018, so I wanna know how are those resolutions coming along? I'm pretty sure that most of you have already reneged on them huh? I'm just kidding, but I hope that those of you that have made those resolutions for 2018 are sticking to them so far. So before getting into this week's topic, I'd like to give my thoughts on something that I'm sure many of you that are sports fans are following; the NFL playoffs. After two weeks of games, we are officially down to the final four teams. This weekend we have the Jacksonville(Sacksonville) Jaguars taking on the New England Patriots, and the Minnesota Vikings going up against the Philadelphia Eagles. Before getting into my prediction, man what an ending that was to the New Orleans Saints and Vikings game huh? I'm sure that most people that are fans of the Saints will probably disagree, but that was a great game regardless of who won in my opinion. So for the games this weekend, I'm going to predict that the Patriots will beat the Jaguars. It think it will be a good hard fought game, and I think Jacksonville will give the Patriots a hard time. However, it is hard to go against the experience the Patriots have. I'll be pulling for the Jaguars, but I think they lose. In the other game, I think the Vikings will take out the Eagles. They're riding on the momentum of that thrilling ending last week, plus they have the home-field advantage. I think the Eagles luck runs out this week. Those are just my brief predictions. I could be wrong, so lets see what happens. Alright, it is now time to get into the main topic for the week of past mistakes and fear of future decisions.

As with the usual formula I tend to use, I'd like to go ahead and mention that we all have different views and opinions. I don't expect everyone to agree with me on this or any of the other topics that I choose to discuss on here. The primary objective here isn't to force my beliefs on anyone, but rather to hopefully encourage others to think about various topics in ways that they may not have before. One of the beauties of life is being able to interact with others, and find yourself walking away from that interaction feeling like you gained something that you didn't know beforehand. That is the same idea that I'm trying to push on here. If you don't happen to agree with me on this or any of the other topics, that is perfectly fine and well within your right to do so. Whatever your beliefs may be, I am still appreciative of those that take a little bit of time out of your day to see what I'm thinking about. So how did I arrive at wanting to address the topic of past mistakes and fear for future decisions? I had a discussion last week with my sister where I kinda touched on this. It wasn't anything that was planned or intentional, it was just something that came to my mind while we were talking. Since then it has kinda stayed in my mind, so I figured it would be a good theme to base this week's inspiration around. Some of what I'm going to address may not apply to many of you, but I do hope that it does provide some inspiration for those that maybe find themselves being indecisive because of past failures.

Have you ever wondered why so many of us tend to beat ourselves up for the mistakes that we make? As I mentioned earlier, to be alive is to make mistakes, which means that mistakes and bad choices are due to happen sometimes. We're all prone to making mistakes, yet we often judge and ridicule others for the mistakes they make. Now I suppose I can understand why people coming down harder on people that make the same mistakes constantly. If you make the same mistakes over and over again, then you likely aren't learning anything, and I see mistakes as lessons that should have a takeaway from them. However, teasing and picking on another person for not knowing something or finding themselves in a silly moment isn't good in my opinion. I believe much of the fear that comes along with not making mistakes deals with the idea of judgement from previous mishaps. There are many people that aren't easily able to brush off other people that pass judgement on us. I'm going to use the example of basketball to setup the point that I'm making. Just imagine a high school basketball player that blows a wide open layup during a game, and this same student gets picked on by his peers the next day at school. If he or she isn't able to mentally block out that criticism, they will probably do everything in their ability to avoid putting themselves in that kind of situation during future games. They are allowing the fear of a past mistake to paralyze their future. Though basketball is more small scale thinking, I think this was a decent example to compare to the bigger picture of mistakes for life in general.

Now I stated in the previous paragraph that I view mistakes as lessons, and while I do believe this wholeheartedly, I also believe they're not automatic lessons that we just instantly pick up on. Similar to studying for a test or wanting to learn something new in your life, I believe that the mistakes that we make throughout our lives need to be broken down and analyzed if they're to be learned from. Always keep in mind that mistakes will happen time and time again, but they'll likely happen even more often if we're not make a conscious attempt to learn from them. Now it is normal to feel fear and anxiety for the future when you've made bad choices in the past before. You find that you're constantly questioning whether or not you will do the right thing next time, which can lead to a lot of indecisiveness. However, regardless of how afraid we may find ourselves being for the upcoming choices we may have to make in our lives, the fact remains that mistakes of the past can lead to growth, and from my perspective, the best way to grow as a person is to embrace your mistakes. Furthermore, just because you've made mistakes in the past does not mean that past outcomes will result in the future. Yes it is important to learn from mistakes and mishaps, but using them as a benchmark for our futures only keeps us afraid. This is exactly why I feel that so many of us hate to make decisions, because we're still stuck on bad choices we've made in the past. Growth indeed does comes from mistakes, but making mistakes doesn't mean that we shouldn't move forward.

So why shouldn't we allow the fear of past mistakes to paralyze us for the future decisions? There could be a variety of ways to answer this and much of it honestly depends on a person's mode of thinking. However, from my personal perspective on this, the simple answer is that the past is the past, and the past doesn't, nor should it be the primary determinant of what the future may be. If you made a decision in the past that turned out not to be in your favor, it happened the way it did for a reason. The important thing is that you learn and grow from whatever it was. Also, we have to keep in mind that we're not machines, therefore regardless of how hard we may try to prevent potential mistakes of the future, there will always be a human element that exists. I've mentioned it a couple of times already in this post, but I don't think it can be rehashed enough. We are all humans here, so we're all going to be flawed, which means that we're going to make mistakes whether we want to or not. While I do believe that mistakes can be costly depending on what it may be, I also believe that mistakes are a necessity for life. We can't always be right about everything all the time, so why should we believe that we're never supposed to fail at something? So to sum up; our past is just that, the past. Lets learn from our mistakes going forward, and don't allow bad decisions in the past to affect our future. Lets work on developing the confidence in ourselves that is required to make the best choices for ourselves, but also be mindful that we're humans that should always allow room for errors.

Well we have arrived at the conclusion of another topic for the week. It is time to sign off for now, but I'll be back soon. I'd like to thank everyone once again that came through for another topic of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! As I always mention before closing, I hope that there was some meaning and understanding that could be gained from this, as well as the other topics I address on here. If you have any comments or feedback, feel free to drop them down in the comments. You can also follow me on Twitter @BradrickH if you'd like. I hope that 2018 is treating you all well so far, and I hope that you all are having a great weekend. Big Sunday in the NFL tomorrow, so I hope those of you that are football fans enjoy. Take care everyone, and I'll see you all in the next one! Peace!

©2018 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.

Look For Better Ways To Handle The Issues In Your Life.

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Something that people that know or follow me on here probably notice is that I frequently draw a lot of references from movies and television shows when I'm hoping to get a point across. Besides finding personal enjoyment from various shows and movies, I'm not really sure why I do this so often. I bring this up because I'm about to reference to something in a film from a few years back in order to establish a point. Aside from the tragic shooting that took place in Colorado on the opening night of the film that I'm referring to, some of you probably remember the movie "The Dark Knight Rises" from the summer of 2012. There's a scene where Alfred Pennyworth tells an older and broken Bruce Wayne that he isn't Batman anymore, and that he has to find another way to make an impact besides sacrificing his body. The reason why I bring this up is because we all have habits and vices that we engage in that aren't necessarily good for us, and many of us find ourselves relying on these habits whenever issues arise in our lives. Whether this applies to you personally, or if you know someone that frequently rely on their vices to cope whenever things aren't going so well, this probably sounds pretty familiar to most of you. We all know that no one is perfect, and conquering bad habits in our lives isn't an feat. However, what Alfred said to Wayne in the film that I'm using as a reference is the message that I'm bringing to you all this week. We have to look for better ways to handle the issues that we're facing.

Yo! What is up everyone? It is your boy Brad H. back once more, and I'd like to welcome everyone to another installment of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! I am here once again to hopefully spread some inspiration that can help us all be inspired to be the best versions of ourselves. We have made it to 2018 folks, and this is the first post for this new year. I'd like to start off by wishing everyone a Happy New Year, and I hope that 2018 has been treating you all well so far. As I mentioned in the previous topic that I wrote about, the year 2017 wasn't the best year for me, and I know several others that share in my sentiments on this when it came to their lives. The last couple of weeks of 2017 added to an already extremely challenging year due to the passing of my great uncle. I'm certain that many of you that have lost friends and relatives during the holidays know how much of a challenge it can be to cope with. I'm not one for new years resolutions and things of that nature much anymore, however, I want to encourage everyone (including myself) to try and find happiness in every single day for this year. I'm not saying that we have to be happy all the time, or that we have to front being happy when we're really not. I'm just saying that if you can find at least one thing daily to be happy and grateful for, then you are on the right track towards becoming a happier person. Not saying that this method will work or anything like that, just giving my opinion. So again I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year, and lets try and leave the negativity that happened last year behind. Alright, now that I've gotten all of that out of the way, it's time to get into this week's topic of looking for better ways to handle the issues in our lives.

Before I get into this week's talking point, I'd like to go ahead and say that we all have different viewpoints on life. I say that to say that I don't expect everyone to agree with what I'm addressing in this, or any of the other topics that I talk about. The main objective here isn't to alter or change anyone else's beliefs, but rather to hopefully encourage us all to think about things in ways we may not have before. One of the absolute beautiful things about life that I love is how you can talk to another person, and walk away from that talk thinking about things in a way that you never had before. It's a great thing when you're able to learn from others in my opinion. My hope is that I can give some insight that can maybe encourage others to walk away feeling that they learned something that they never thought of before. If that isn't the case for some, that is totally fine. I always say that I'm just one person with an opinion, but I still appreciate those of you that are interested in what I have to say. This particular topic is one that crossed my mind a couple of weeks back. Not really sure how it came to mind, but I thought it would be a good talking point for a post. Also, I think that thinking about The Dark Knight Rises movie probably helped contribute to my wanting to talk about finding other ways to deal with our issues. This particular issue is one that I'm sure that I've addressed in a previous topic, but I figured that tying in what Alfred said to Bruce in the film helps give it an alternate perspective.

Now that we've established that in the film that we're using as a reference for this week, Alfred was referring to Wayne sacrificing his body, and that he needed to find another way to make an impact besides the physicality of being Batman. What I want to tie all this into is how many of us channel a lot of the negative things that happen in our lives to things that are hurtful to us in the long run. If we're being honest with ourselves, most of us know that we turn to our vices whenever we're depressed, stressed out, etc. Now in saying this, having a vice or vices isn't to be judged or looked down upon. It's in our nature to want to turn to the things that make us feel good when we're uncomfortable. I want to be sure and establish that, because a lot of people that are imperfect and have vices of their own often look down on others for their vices. I don't agree with this at all, and honestly one habit or vice isn't any better than another. Regardless of what the vice is or may be, they all can be detrimental to us if not stopped or controlled. This is where the problem lies, and the reasoning for why I feel that we should look for better ways to handle the issues that occur in our lives. When we make the choice to go to or do something that isn't good for us because we're in a turmoil, not only are we not facing the issues head on, we're self-medicating ourselves in a manner that can be hurtful in the long run. Many of us don't see the habits in our lives as overly bad things, but years upon years of doing something regardless of how minute you may thing it is adds up, and can have negative impact on our lives.

So now I want to get into some of the habits and vices that I'm thinking about as I'm writing this. We're all aware of the ones that many of us consider to be the worse of the worse. These include habits such as drug use, alcohol, self-harm, etc. Now although they are probably considered to be the more dangerous habits, there are others that we have that tend to get overlooked, yet they can have a negative impact in the long run. What are some of the things we're talking about here you may ask? Things like over-eating, video games, and social media can also be classified as addictions if they're overdone. Sure they may not have the same effect as drug use, etc, but years upon years of engaging in these lesser degree acts during times of turmoil can have the same negative effect on our lives. So for an example here, we're going to use the idea of over-eating. I'm sure most of you have heard of binge eating right? How many occasions can you point to where have you have maybe found yourself eating when you find yourself stressed out? If you have never done this, then you probably know someone who has engaged in this act when they were having problems. We of course know that over-eating doesn't do anything but add more pounds to our bodies, which in turn can lead to health problems. Sure it may not affect you immediately, but the long term effects can be hurtful to your quality of life. This is just one example, but I'm sure many of you get the gist of what I'm saying here. Regardless of how small it may seem, anything that you turn to or overdo in time of turmoil can be classified as an addiction.

So how do we overcome these addictions in our lives? Well it depends a lot on you and what you struggle with when you are having issues. However, I have a few things to think about that may help. First, I think it is important to identify anything in your life that can be seen as an addiction. For example, whenever you find yourself stressed or depressed, try and pay attention to the things that you do or don't do afterwards. Secondly, think about whether or not what you're doing is helping or hurting you. Is it really wise or good for you to binge eat because you're having issues? Finally, and the most important part of this post, look for something else (preferably something more positive) to replace that habit. So instead of eating because you're sad or depressed, go talk a walk or go for a run. These are things that can only help you out health wise in the long run, and they can make you feel good about yourself as well. These are just a few examples, but do whatever works for you. As I mention all the time, we're all different and have different ways of viewing things. This also means that the way we choose do things is going to vary from person to person as well. The most important point that I want to get across is to look for other ways that are more positive to deal with your problems. We're all human and fall short, but acknowledging, learning and applying new techniques and strategies can go a long way towards handling our problems better. So lets take Alfred's advice, and lets find other ways to combat the problems in our lives.

Well we have arrived at the end of another topic folks. It is time to depart for now, but thank you all once again for stopping by for another one of 'Brad H.'s Perspective'! As always, I hope that there was some meaning and understanding that could be gained from this, as well as the other topics I address. If you have any comments or feedback on this, feel free to drop those in the comments. You can also follow me on Twitter @BradrickH if you'd like. Well 2018 is upon us folks, so lets try and make this year a good one. All the hardships of 2017 are behind us, so lets be laser focused and positive for this new year. I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year again, and I hope you all have a great weekend, as well as a great week ahead. Take care everybody, and I'll see you all in the next one. Peace!

©2018 Bradrick H. All Rights Reserved.